I have a rice cooker

I have a rice cooker. I have had a rice cooker for a little over a month now, it must be. I use it to cook rice! It is also possible to steam veggies 'n' things using the rice cooker. You can even do it while you cook the rice! If you want!!

I have actually only used it three times total since I got it. Not because I'm lazy or anything, but because I don't have a convenient place to plug it in. My little kitchenette has no outlet. Unlike my friend's apartment just down the hallway. He has an outlet. His outlets also have three holes - that is to say, ground. None of my outlets have three holes. They all have two holes.

I think my hardwood floor is also older than his.

I would like to use the rice cooker more. I would like to know how to prepare an actual meal, too, instead of just a bowl of rice. I mean, don't get me wrong; a bowl of rice is pretty great! But as a meal it is rather bland, yes? Maybe I could teach myself how to make sushi. I'd love some sushi right about now.

But enough about sushi! Let's talk about my cooking abilities.

They are essentially non-existent. I can make pancakes using Bisquik. I can fry an egg. I can... well, that about sums it up. I don't consider using the rice cooker a skill. Maybe you do. I don't. Oh, I did make some tacos. Rather simple tacos, mind you, but tacos nonetheless. It wasn't very difficult. Thaw meat in microwave, throw on pan, fry 'til not pink, add seasoning, stir, fry a little more. Once the meat was done I nuked a tortilla shell for a few seconds and wrapped some meat and cheese in it. Repeat until full. Not difficult, still tasty.

But not tasty enough.

I'm thinking about trying my hand at egg salad. It looks simple enough. I just need to procure the ingredients. I also really, really want to eat some mabodofu - it is my favorite Chinese dish that is available in Japan and not available in America. I think I'll try to make that, too...

I have a rice cooker. It is the beginning of the end. Further posts on this topic will be less boring. I promise.

P.S., I totally made some biscuits earlier, using one of those ready-to-bake Pillsbury things, and it exploded on me when I opened it because I forgot I had it out of the fridge for a while. I am going places.

Something different

[jonzo] hey i wanna write about something
[jonzo] give me a topic
[axord] write about going back to japan to sucba dive in caves
[axord] caves found ON TOP OF MNT FUJI

Such an activity would probably be the pinnacle of all activities. The epitome of sheer cool. The ultimate in badassery.

I don't think anyone could argue this. Unless they are a fun-hater. Are you a fun-hater? I didn't think so.

The other day I was hangin' out with me mams and somehow the topic of space came up. I don't remember why. I told her I wanted to go to Mars and that if I did, I could die happy. She seemed shocked by this and took it pretty seriously... And although I meant it to be taken in a humorous fashion (as I am quite the joker), I was being serious after a fashion.

I don't fear dying. I don't fear much at all, really. I'm ready to live life to the fullest. (Inasmuch as I, personally, enjoy life.) However! I still wish I could live forever. When I think about all the things I won't see in humanity's future simply because I won't be alive, it bothers me significantly.

What is going to happen to humanity? Will we kill each other off? Will we finally find peace? These are the boring questions. No one with an imagination like mine gives two measly wossnames about that nonsense. The real question is this: What will we find out there? Other intelligent life forms? Or are we completely alone? Either way, we can at least spread out, explore, terraform and oh man I'm getting dizzy just thinking about it.

Space. It's awesome. And, granted, there's still a lot we don't know about our own planet. We have yet to dive to the deepest depths of the ocean. New species of land animals are still being discovered all the time. There's also all that stuff we don't know about us. There is much to learn. But, at least for me, the most exciting thing we can do, the thing that yields the largest potential, is exploration. Oh, to be alive in the days of yore when those brave souls sailed across the Atlantic Ocean and discovered the Americas. Can any of us really imagine what that must have been like? Of course not! With the rare exception of those who have been in space, I imagine.

So, back to Mars. Will we land on that glorious red planet and at last find evidence of an ancient Martian civilization? Uh, most likely not. But it is the next obvious step. Let's get the fuck out there and stop meandering down here on Earth, eh?

SPACE: THE FINAL FRONTIER.

I would absolutely jump at the chance to go to Mars. Without hesitation, and even if it meant I would never be coming back. Not only would it mean I had accomplished something huge with my life, but it would also hopefully be the catalyst for the human species to open their eyes and look to the stars once more.

Dream Big, Jonny Boy.

Of course, all this is moot because I'm too fucking tall to be an astronaut. Thanks NASA. (Go go privately-owned-and-operated space exploration!)

The new me in the old world

Sheeeit, mang. Who am I? Where am I? what am I doing? It's like a whole new world! I am doing things this year I never thought I'd be doing when I started college. Always have been a bit of a, uh, what is it... socially inept sort of fellow? I'm probably still awkward but at least I don't care anymore. Well, mostly. Of course, I have Japan to thank for that. Old news. Old. News.

The point is, I went caving last weekend with UC's Mountaineering Club. But I'm a little too... shall we say husky for it. I couldn't fit into the crawlspaces with everyone else, so while they were off exploring, I was stuck waiting in the dark cave alone. Which, in itself, was kind of a cool experience. For a while I had my headlight on, but then I figured why waste the battery, and turned that sucker off. (Actually it was just to get rid of all the fucking bugs flying around my goddamn head.) I've never been in pitch blackness before! Actually, I have to be honest. There was a small point of very dim light that pointed to the entrance to the cave... But other than that I couldn't see a damned thing! I could hear shit, though. Drip drip goes the water. And I think I heard cave crickets crawling around my head - there was some weird sound I couldn't identify, but that's my best guess.

It was bizarre.

Anyway, yeah, I couldn't fit in the crawlspaces. Or at least I felt like I couldn't. Maybe I could've fit through at least one of them, if I forced my way through, but I felt pretty good and stuck before I was even halfway, and I guess I was afraid I wouldn't be able to get BACK through. I'm not claustrophobic by any stretch of the imagination, but... hey. It was a new thing for me. I'm allowed to be a frightened little child.

What I'm trying to get at here is that this is the first time my weight (that is to say, my overweight, my physical girth) has actually impeded on my ability to enjoy life. I mean sure, because I'm out of shape, I might get tired easier than other people, but it's never outright prevented me from doing something. It was... kind of depressing. It's not even like I'm ginormous, either, I'm just too big for the wossnames, you know.

I really was excited for caving, too. It's one of those things I've always wanted to do.

I wonder, though, if I'm just too big even if I was in shape. I'm not a small guy! I mean, 6'4" is nothing to scoff at! Who knows. The only way to find out is to get in shape, and that's what I've been working on since the school year began (albeit sporadically - I really should stick to the fucking schedule, eh?).

On a happier note, I'm second in the reserve line for the trip to Mt. Washington this February. Only second! I should probably be bummed I'm in the reserves and not going on the trip, since unlike a lot of people in the club, I am a senior. However, senior or not, I'm still new to the club. Shit go down like shit go down. Besides, it's probably better if I don't go. 1) I'm broke. 2) I dunno if I could handle the trip in my shape. 3) It'd be happening right in the middle of when I should be working on my senior design project.

Three great excuses to not be sobbing myself to sleep. Good enough for me.

Life is grand, ain't it? (This is not a sarcastic remark, despite what the context may imply.)

WHAT UP, KIDS

Back in the swing o' things, m'self.

That is to say, back in the swing o' not really bein' in the swing o' things. It makes perfect sense if you think about it. I promise.

Two weekends ago, I went backpacking. One weekend ago, I partied with some friends I haven't seen for a long while (with the exception of two: one who is in a few of my classes and the other who I saw not long after I returned to America). The party was fun. Cops were called. We were too loud, I guess.

But the backpacking was the real trip! Pun not intended, but most definitely acknowledged. We went to Red River Gorge and stayed one night.

I mean, prior to backpacking, the last outdoorsy shindig I was involved with was climbing Mt. Fuji. We all know how that went. This was on a whole a much more pleasant and enjoyable experience. Everything I did, I did with people of a like mind, but it was also a beginner's backpacking trip. Perfect for people like me, who maybe went camping a bunch as a young'un but haven't been around a campfire for years (bonfires don't count), let alone slept outside!

I need to make a habit of this shit, yo.

Naturally, I took my camera. Here is my favorite picture...

I wanna be a real boy!

Well, it's been a while since I wrote anything. I had intended to write some proverbial Final Thoughts or some shit regarding my extranational experiences much sooner than this, but the world turns as the world turns and sometimes it just don't turn for you!

So here goes.

Japan is probably the best thing that has ever happened to me...

Let me start again.

Japan is undoubtedly the best thing that has ever happened to me. I remember when I first signed up for this ICP nonsense, it was kind of half-heartedly. I always knew I'd eventually be going to Japan, and I knew I had to keep above a 3.0 GPA to be eligible. I did it, and I made it. But even with all the problems I had getting a job prior to leaving the country, and getting my passport, and packing, and and and and... AND-- It bit me in the ass. I don't know how, but I just really didn't feel it coming until I was already landing.

And then I was in Japan. I've talked enough about my experiences. No doubt as I catch up with everyone they'll ask me questions and I'll mumble and attempt to traverse my terrible memory until they walk away disappointed...

Alas! That's not why I'm writing NOW at THIS MOMENT IN TIME.

Japan changed me. Not in an immediately obvious way, and especially not in an outward way. I no doubt still appear to be the same shy guy who lacks any significant amount of confidence, but inside I am different! I promise. I'm more confident - this isn't something I had a problem with before, but people often equate shyness with lack of confidence. Nonetheless, I am more confident now.

More importantly, I've gotten over one of my greatest character flaws: lack of motivation. For the longest time I had no real desire to do anything, and I spent a lot of time moping about wondering why oh why I couldn't find the desire to do things. Oops. The solution? Just fucking do it, idiot.

I'm not sure when or how it happened or what the catalyst was in Japan, but at some point while I was over there, I just realized that I did not think about it anymore. How excellent! I started doing pixel art for fun (this was in Korea, when I had a lot more time for it and didn't feel exhausted after work). I started really planning out a game with My Good Buddy. We've made it a lot further than we ever have before and soon I'll continue with my part of the project -once I get a fucking desk. (Motivation or not, a few piles of boxes does not make for a comfortable working desk. Ironically, I still suffer through it for vidya gaems. Clearly I've still got priority issues!) Photography, traveling, outdoorsy things - I discovered/rediscovered loves for all these and more.

I am excited about life.

So. Yeah. Thanks, Japan!

A kick in the face!

There is nothing quite like a breakfast trip with my small town Indianaianiananin (from Indiana) grandparents to the local Mom's Restaurant, wherein the ceiling is lined with dollar bills signed by patrons past, all of whom were likely the same type of customers you see now - predominantly overweight, all white.

The restaurant lies on the corner of an intersection and is neighbor to a gas station, which sells live bait, and a church. All around this uncharacteristically large intersection (five roads!) are farms. Fields and fields of crops. On the opposite side of one swiftly yellowing field lies a thin barrier of likewise yellowing trees - the only thing separating my house and its respective community from this intersection.

I eat biscuits and gravy, a scrambled egg, hash browns. My grandparents order grits with their meal. It is familiar territory.

My father has started his own miniature farm in our backyard. Some might call it a garden. Corn, cucumbers, green onions. These are all harvested already. There are a few tomatoes left. He even planted some watermelon. They are still small.

Welcome home, Jonny Boy. Welcome home.

Meeting of Minds

This morning... well, last night, I guess, since I'm BACK IN AMERICA, I met Yoshiro Kimura.

He's pretty rockin'. Rad maximum. Raximum. To the max.

I was pretty nervous about meeting him, in no small part because I know I am an extremely shy man. But! I had set the meeting and I had no intention of turning back. I was determined.

I woke up early to finish packing, because 1) I planned to head to the airport immediately after the meeting ended and 2) I kind of... gave up the night prior. Some inexplicable wave of exhaustion set over me and I collapsed in the middle of folding my clothes. It probably had to do with my extreme hatred for packing, I'm sure. Luckily, I managed to spur forth enough energy to set my alarm extra early.

So, yes... I packed. I finished a little earlier than I thought I would. I looked at the clock. Time passes very slowly at moments like this. Fact of life. Everyone feels it. Probably some science mumbo-jumbo to explain it, but really the only thing anyone needs to know is it's dreadfully dull.

Time to leave. Got to a station near where I'd meet him. Walked around for far too long looking for an open locker for my big suitcase. Found nothing. Ahh, gonna be late if I wait any longer! I stuffed all my other baggage in a smaller locker (two lockers, actually) and took my walking stick and big suitcase to the train for the last few stops. Upon arrival, I exited to meet the creator of a bunch of games I've never played but always been interested in, including but not limited to Moon: An RPG Remix Adventure (or something like that), Chulip, and Little King's Story.

He is known (at least to me) as someone whose games often contain original and intriguing concepts. This is something I strive for when I search for ideas in the great, largely empty and easily distracted ocean that is my mind. Sometimes, though, I think I've hit a real gem, and I will write it down in some fashion, to come back to later.

So, basically, what I'm getting at is I want to be like this guy - taking my (self-labeled) wonderful ideas and creating a (player-labeled) wonderful game. In meeting him, I hoped to get some insight on How He Does It, and start working toward that goal.

I think I damn well succeeded at that. However, out of respect for privacy, I will limit what I say about the conversation...

Granted, a large part of what he told me, I already knew. Stop being lazy and actually do something. Haha, he actually berated me when I said I would. "Will you really?" He knows me already! We talked for two hours! Since what he said was basically true, I couldn't really do anything but laugh. I will work on the laziness.

Another bit of wisdom I already knew (and have actually sort of been working on, I swear!) is to start simple. Copy established games. You don't have to be original until you can actually do originality justice. That's why I've been making pong! And after that, Ijaspy, whose very NAME exudes simplicity! Sort of...

Let's see, what else did he say... Work on one idea at a time; don't spread your personal, limited resources across multiple projects. Think about it every day. Draw in the beginning - don't erase, don't write words, just draw. PRACTICE. Etc. Etc. Etc!

You know, basically the advice you'd give anyone just starting out. But it wasn't just what he said, it was the way he said it. He had stories, and all kinds of shit. A cool dude.

Ah, actually, there is something else I can mention, since it has more to do with me than him! I shared a few of my ideas with him. The first one I wasn't actually that sure about, but I thought the idea was one he would like so I shared it hoping to, I don't know, impress him? Stupid. It was the idea he liked least. It has no focus! That's essentially what he told me. A summary of that idea: you are a werewolf in a small town, and can't control yourself during the full moon, but have to try to hide your identity while human.

The other two ideas I shared, though, he seemed to like a bit more. 1) Messin' about with goo to make tools and weapons. 2) Swinging around an obscenely large hammer to control character movement (or at least to propel the character). He laughed when I explained the pictures I'd drawn! I don't think he was laughing at me. It was a jovial, fun kind of laugh! Anyway, these two ideas had a much bigger focus on interactivity. I think he approved of that. The first idea was just kind of a basic story (which, to be fair, is a crucial part of that idea) and one basic mechanic.

It was nice to get some input from someone who's actually in the industry instead of a bunch of fans of the industry. (That's right. All of you who I share my ideas with are worthless. Eat it!)

Needless to say, it was an extremely enlightening experience (alliteration not intended). I'm kind of in a crossfire of a complete lack of organization and getting ready to move into a new apartment at the moment, but once I get settled again, I hope to start following his advice.

But will I actually do it?

We'll see! I'm back home now, hence the situation. In a week, I move again. Granted, this time I only move to Cincinnati instead of billions of miles away.

Dum dum de dum.

Nervous?

Why should I be nervous about going back home?

Hell if I know. But I am!

It's eerily similar to the feeling I had shortly before leaving home. I wonder if it's just an anxiety for Big Change. I've gotten incredibly used to being in Japan, and now it's time to get over it.

It's strange, though...

I'm going to wait until I'm officially out of Japan and back in my bedroom in quaint, ol' Lebanon, Ohio, Yoo Ess Ayy before I say too much about How I Feel About My Experiences. But... for the past week or so, one thought that's remained quite vigilant, no matter how much logic or philosophy I throw at it, is this: have I really lived in Japan, yet? This thought is disconcerting, in a way, because that was my ultimate goal when I decided to participate in the International Co-op Program.

Ahhhh.

I'm ready! I'm ready!

The time is swiftly approaching when I will pack my bags and leave the Land of the Rising Sun. I will be returning to a world of everlasting sunset, forever.

Or at least a few years. Hopefully I will be able to return at some point. Perhaps on a walkabout. You can't tell, but I'm waggling my eyebrows quite viciously.

Man I can't wait to get home. I dunno if I can say the same about going back to school, but mostly, sniff sniff, I miss my friends and family. Awrz!

My plans for the remainder of my stay in Japan (about four and a half days now!) consist of...

1) finishing work (2.5 days left!) and then...
2) bowling/drinking Friday night for the last time with my coworkers and hoping I don't have too big a hangover for...
3) going to the Studio Ghibli museum Saturday morning after which I will begin...
4) packing/cleaning Saturday evening, all the while looking forward to...
5) going to Tokyo Sunday morning to meet Yoshiro Kimura, who is totally awesome and responsible for the recent Wii game, Little King's Story, which I look forward to playing as soon as possible once I return to America, which will happen after...
6) getting on the plane home Sunday evening.

a little king flees from a herd of evil cows

Unfortunately, seeing as how Friday is my last day of work, I will no longer have a Japanese cell phone (it is a work phone) on Saturday and Sunday. Normally not a problem for me, but since I'll be Going Places and Meeting People... Cell phones are convenient. Yeah.

P.S., Eric Davies! I still don't know who you are.

BLAST FROM THE PAST pt. 10 (and 11)

I'm pumping all of these old entries out now because I wanted to do it before I left Japan. I just kind of forgot about it until now. OOPS.

I eventually did not ever go back to Shinjuku Gyoen. Oops doubletwice! But that's okay 'cause I went to a million other places. Even before the sakura went away!

I'm sure, now, I have the motivation to continue to fulfill my photographic desires, even outside Japan.

Well, probably.

03/31/09 - SHIT IS PINK, YO

Sakura, eh? Beautiful.

One of the few things I absolutely wanted to see from the very moment I decided I would try to come to Japan. We went to Shinjuku Gyouen (Shinjuku Garden) today for hanami (sakura viewing). It was pretty fucking glorious. I think I'm getting better at picking good angles and framing shots. I took what I think are some pretty damn good pictures today. I think I might go back to the park on my own sometime so I have all the time I want instead of having to stick with the group. Or I can go somewhere else I guess.

Regardless... extremely pretty.

I love Japan. I mean, yes, I could've taken pretty pictures at home, but I don't know if I could have found the motivation without doing something as drastic as Moving To Another Country.

And just because it's the last thing I wrote before I gave up the first time, here's... the last thing I wrote before I gave up the first time!

Nothing particularly interesting. You could say I went out on considerably less than a bang.

04/01/09 - LOW-LIGHTING HURTS

Train surfing... the next big sport. Calling it now.

Edo-Tokyo museum is purdy neet. All the low lighting was hell on the ol' camera, though.

Also Canada is dumb. They signed the wrong line on the Japanese document of surrender during WWII. Good job!

Walked back from Shinjuku in the rain tonight. Was raining pretty hard, too. I haven't done that in a while. I was totally drenched by the time I got back and it was absolutely fantastic.

That is all.

BLAST FROM THE PAST pt. 9

The hope paid off in spades! Although I'm definitely ready to go home, now. The work I'm doing is just... so not enjoyable. Soon, my pretties. Soon, I will be back with you.

No, but really, I'd totally be a space pirate. Shut up. Shut up.

03/30/09 - THERE IS HOPE YET

Today entailed a trip to the Suntory Brewery.

Yep. I still hate beer. That stuff is awful, I don't know how anyone can even pretend to say it tastes good. People are weird. Gimme hard liquor any time of the day.

Then we went to a mountain that we only halfway climbed. Some neat pictures of trees and rocks and a few shrines, but not much else. Sadly, it was too dark to climb to the top and back. Ah well. If I get to stay, somehow, I'll climb Mt. Fuji with everyone else. Probably won't get to stay, but...

On the bright side, meeting with duder from Japan American Foundation tomorrow. Still no word from the higher-ups that duder can hire me, but the possibility exists. WE SHALL SEE.

Not much else to say today, though. Except I want to be a space pirate!! And Hakone maybe next weekend? Might be rough though, since I don't yet know... where I'm going.

Slapstick haters be damned.

If you hate this, you hate life.

On Saturday I went to Nikko. At Nikko I visited two shrines and one temple. (If I recall correctly.)

It was neat. But I'm not sure what I can say about this kind of thing that I haven't said already. Pictures would do wonders here. Maybe I'll dig a bit out tonight.

What few words I can say: we - that is to say Robert, Tyler, and I - had the opportunity to hear the dragon's roar. Or shriek, more like, I suppose. A monk duder hit two blocks of wood together and it echoed. We don't know how it echoed, because the room we were in certainly did not appear to be made for echoes! I guessed maybe some of the things in the room are made to absorb that pitch (it was a rather high pitched noise) and then shoot it back out. But I don't know fizzix, so I was really just pulling it out of my ass.

Maybe dragons are real. O:

And yesterday I went to Akihabara one last time, with Robert. And I bought a ton of crap.

A side note: I wonder how many people secretly despise me because of my abrasive and argumentative nature. What can I say? I love arguing, whether I'm right or wrong, or even whether there's even anything to argue about or not!

BLAST FROM THE PAST pt. 7 (and 8)

WARNING: HINTS OF PRIOR FRUSTRATION.

I have also seen Japanese people do it. Very rarely, but it's happened! I even heard one guy singing along with the music!

However, at this point I can't even remember it happening in America. I'm sure there must have been a reason I said this.

Also, after rereading this, I'm sure I'm weird, probably unique. In fact, I have no doubt.

03/28/09 - TIME TO RELAX... OR NOT

I noticed something strange today. Japanese people don't... move to the music when they're out and about. With headphones on, I can and will tap my hands or feet to the beat, or perhaps mouth the words to the song. Sometimes I'll even make up my own beats to go with the songs. Japanese people... don't do any of this. When they're listening to music on the train, they just sit or stand there. Totally stoic. No movement at all related to the music. Of course, then there are people who play DS or PSP or phone games.

For the first time today I listened to music on the train and I felt out of place if I tapped even just my thumb and finger together to the beat.

Eh. No big.

What was big was karaoke. Did some of that today. Two and a half hours of nine of us singing (or refusing to sing). Way more fun than I expected, although nine of us stuffed into that tiny room was kind of hot. Still, much much better than singing in a public karaoke bar like it's done in America. Do not like that at all.

Best part is rapping when you don't know how the song goes!

Genius idea #1 that would never work: make people pay to use escalators in Japan. TEN YEN A POP, BABY. Teehee.

Side note: Really looking forward to Hakone tomorrow. I've seen enough of the big city for now. Goddamn.

Further side note: Have an "interview" on Monday, but not really? With some dude from the Japan American Foundation. There's no guarantee I even CAN get a job there yet, but I'm meeting him anyway, just in case. I actually have some hope left in my tiny, shriveled heart. I'm surprised. Though I'm a little miffed about how much I'll be making compared to how much I'd have to spend for the job -- end up with only about $100 a month. For six months. $600. As opposed to the scholarship which would get me $1000 for three months with no work. (But I'd have to be in class...) I'm a bit bitter.

Oops. A rant. Blech.

---

And here's the next day because, LAFF, it's one line. I of course went later. Also, if I had been less depressing, I might have mentioned that the day we didn't go to Hakone was the same day I first ate McDonald's in Japan. A MOMENTOUS OCCASION IF I EVER HEARD ONE.

03/29/09 - A FAILURE OF A TRIP

No Hakone. Oh well.

BLAST FROM THE PAST pt. 6

I wonder if I'd do another tea ceremony.

Shudder.

03/27/09 - SENSEI == OTOO-SAN ???

Japanese tea ceremonies are fucking BRUTAL. Oh my GOD my KNEES. HOW DOES ANYONE SIT LIKE THAT WITHOUT BEING IN PAIN.

Okay, now that that's out of the way...

Japanese tea ceremonies are fucking cool. The style, the details, the formalities. It all comes together into one amazingly cool example of Japanese culture that doesn't have one goddamn thing to do with anime or video games or pop culture of any sort. I totally enjoyed it and I got to be a PART of it. So cool.

Still, the pain. I hope I don't have to deal with that again. Or maybe I do, so I can get used to it. I don't know! It was very cool and I'm glad I experienced it at least once.

Sensei helped me buy a pair of nice pants today, since the pair I brought doesn't fit. Go me! (I am an idiot.) Felt like my dad was there helping me buy my first pair of dress pants, getting it sized and hemmed. Heh. Wish I could understand Japanese better myself so I could've done it without him, though. Oh well, maybe one day.

Also gonna need dress shoes at some point if I get a job. Probably going to have to get those shipped from America. Size 14 just ain't happenin' in Japan, I assume. Heh. That might actually be the hardest part of living in Japan for me, is my size. I need to find a way to shrink!

Was going to do karaoke tonight but thanks to a bunch of miscommunication, that didn't happen at all.

Home, home on the range

Hah, I used to sing that song all the time when I was a kid. I don't know why. Now all I can remember is that and "where the deer and the antelope play!"

Oh wait, here comes more. Joggin' those memories.

And seldom is heard, a discouraging word, and the skies are not cloudy all daaaaaaaay!

My range isn't like that. My range is stuffy and confined and involves lots of textbooks and tests. And seldom is seen a deer or an anteloupe.

But I am soon heading back! My time in Japan is nearing an end. I'm excited to return to the land of my ancestors, where instead of hunting deer and antelope, we raise domesticated animals to slaughter and consume them.

Not so different from Japan, I guess.

How will I fare with the change in environment, though? I am currently reading Pyramids, by Terry Pratchett. In it, a prince goes off to a distant city, the great Ankh-Morpork, to study the gentlemanly ways of the assassin. Upon his father's death, he must return to his homeland and take the throne. But he now thinks of Ankh-Morpork as his home!

Will the same thing happen to me?!

The answer: no, of course not, stupid. I'm not a trained assassin. Or a king! And I've only been here for six months.

Still might be awkward for a bit, though.

BLAST FROM THE PAST pt. 5

Haha, those crows.

I still like shrines. And I think Meiji Shrine is still one of my favorites. I wonder if I'd feel the same if I went back again!

I forgot I bought those postcards... I wonder where they went.

03/26/09 - I LIKE OLD THINGS AND CROWS

Meiji Shrine. Excellent place to visit. Cool pictures abound. And crows. God the crows.

CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW

Everywhere at Yoyogi, and pretty prominent at the shrine. I don't know the word for crow in Japanese, but if I had to pick one it'd be something like what one of my ICP buds suggested today -- demon bird. Oniitori. Sounds like a good name to me! CAW

No but really. Old things are always awesome to look at. Also learned how to purify myself before entering a shrine. Pretty cool.

The crows are like mutants. Their heads are so big. I don't know, man. I don't know.

More trees than I'd seen for a while. Very beautiful place. Very quiet, too, even with the surprisingly large number of people walking around. Bought some postcards and a happy cat for the mother while I was there. Hurray!

I dream of bus drivers.

Because I woke up Sunday morning and vividly remembered my dream and it was a very strange dream, I wrote about it. And because I can, I'm posting it here.

Amateur psychics and whatnots, tell me what my dream means.

It begins, as many things begin, unexpectedly. I was back in high school and I had quit the band. But my band director, Mr. Wood, managed to talk me into joining again, somehow. After the day's practice, he called me over, conspiratorially, and informed me that the band would be competing the folllowing Saturday in a Star Wars music competition. He had yet to inform the rest of the band, but assured me that I was fully squared away - I guess he knew I would be coming back.

But the day was over and I had to go back home. Somehow I ended up on a bus. But I wasn't supposed to be on the bus! L.J. was also on the bus, though, and going home. I figured if they were going to L.J.'s they'd pass by my house, because my house was on the way. This is sound logic.

I was... with someone, but I can't remember who. Eventually we arrived at a neighborhood that I recognized. It had big houses. I think I recognized it because I'd seen it in OTHER dreams I've had before. I'm not sure if I got off here or not, though.

Nevertheless, eventually I DID get off, and I found myself at a house that I did NOT recognize, but I knew it was my house anyway. I hadn't been able to reach dad, despite calling him the entire ride there, and I didn't have a key, so I had to break in. How did I do this? I turned into an animal of course. I think it was an ant. I climbed up a tree. Upon reaching the third floor window, I turned into a bee to fly over there. My dad's window was not open so I investigated my sister's window. I don't have a siser. But she had a window anyway. The window was open, as I knew it would be, because she is not a responsible person.

I turned into a roly-poly and crawled through the screen. Then I worked my way over to dad's room, where I called him again.

THE NEXT DAY

I was back at school, and the day was over again. This time, though, I was talking to... someone. I think the leader of the bus drivers. She was having this strange effect on me, making me want to stay and eat. But I kept fighting it. I walked out of her office and noticed my bus driver from yesterday, who was attractive, like bus drivers are NOT supposed to be in any logical universe, and she was wolfing down an insane amount of food.

She noticed me and offered me some food. Yet again, I fought it. I turned on my cell phone and attempted to concentrate and teleport away. I don't know why my cell phone had to be on, but it did. I did manage to teleport away, though. But only a few feet.

I did this all night...

The next morning, the attractive bus driver commended me on my success at refusing the food. "You never got away, but you did manage to avoid the temptation with all those attempts to get away. Good job." I think those were her exact words.

Flash forward a couple weeks...

I was out on the playground during recess (in high school?!) with the attractive bus driver. We were wearing nice, formal clothes for some reason. I had helped her escape the urges, as well, and she was thanking me profusely. I just smiled.

Then, I glanced over her shoulder and noticed a couple dancing. I think the woman was the leader of the bus drivers, and for the first time since I'd met her, she looked happy! Since we were happy, too, I asked the attractive bus driver to dance with me. She blushed and agreed.

We danced like it was 1949 and out of nowhere a ton of other (old, ancient) couples appeared to dance with us, while the young kids enjoyed their recess around the dance party.

I suddenly realized I had a dress on.

金持ち

I am not. A rich person, that is.

And yet, what have I been doing for the past two days? Spending ridiculous amounts of money!!

When I first arrived in Japan, the trains were intimidating. Slowly I grew more accustomed to the system. Then, I started thinking they made traveling easy. Now I know it's too easy! "Oh, it's only an hour and a half to get to the middle of Tokyo from my place." Right! "Oh, it's twenty bucks round trip..." IT ADDS UP.

Ahh, but I never really regret it, do I? Nah.

On Saturday, I took a trip to Yokohama. The first place I went was Chinatown. It was a rad maximum stroll, let me tell you. One of the cooler places to just Enjoy the Sights. Yeah, it's just a Chinatown, but so what!!

Yokohama is also having a big 150th Anniversary celebration this year. (IIRC, it's 150 years since they opened their port to the world.) What I specifically wanted to see was the GIANT ROBOT SPIDER. Uuuunfortunately, the ticket to get in the Bayside area and see it was 2,400 yen. I gambled and lost. The spider was cool to look at and all but it wasn't worth 24 buckaroos. I also didn't get to see it move (but that was by my choice -- more on that later).

I expected the whole thing to be pretty big if I was going to pay 2,400 yen, but alas, it turned out to be rather small! I was very disappointed. It was all in Japanese, too, which I expected, and yet I still expected more.

Live and learn, right? Seems to be something I say a lot lately. O:

I thought about sticking around to see the robot move (I'd have to wait an hour), but it was getting dark, and I wanted to see the Terraced Rice Fields in the light of day, so I hauled my ass out to the Hillside area of the celebration. Another 600 yen to get in there.

Yeah the "fields" were about as big as a large bathroom. They were indeed terraced, though! I'm sure that, once again, it was more exciting for non-gaijin.

So after that rather disappointing venture squared, I worked my way to Landmark Tower, home of the fastest elevator in Japan, according to the signs. I took full advantage of my Bayside ticket and got 500 yen off the 1,000 yen ticket to the top. Whoopee.

At the top it was amazing, though! Some more rad maximums! The view was great, and I got some great pictures of the view! All the pretty lights...

Oh, and I found another Jump Store in the Landmark building, and bought Wanted, the book by Eiichiro Oda, which contains a couple shorts, including the second of two One Piece pilots, entitled Romance Dawn. I actually intended to go into the Pokémon Store but got distracted. And then the stores were closing. Oops! It's not like I wanted to buy a stuffed Pikachu or anything to hold at night.

Yesterday was a good deal more expensive, though, but also way more awesome! Except the view from Landmark Tower, I dunno what it'd take to top that. Tokyo Tower was cool, but it was also raining when I went there. So I didn't go all the way to the top.

Hchhhanyway, I met Matt and Tomo at Omote-Sando so Matt could take me to the Oriental Bazaar where I proceeded to buy a yukata. It is, as always, rad maximum. Before that, though, there was some sort of dance parade. I believe the name given to me was Yosakoi? Or Yasokoi. Something like that, anyway. I filmed a bit of it. Pictures didn't really do it justice. In the future, when I am not hampered by the curse of dial up, I will share it with the world. I hope the sound came out all right... The music was sweet!

After the bazaar, we worked our way to just outside Shinjuku. The Square-Enix store. I spent more money there. I bought nerdy things. O:

A plush moogle keychain, a plush slime knight, and four little Dragon Quest figures.

Japan has a TON of those little plastic figures. They're cheap and of much higher quality than I'm used to finding in America. That includes the capsule toys (for the most part). Japan also loves the random. The shelves at the SE store were lined with boxes of figures, only you don't know what's inside until you open it up. I wanted a slime. I got one (1). I think after I get back from Japan, I will write a single post to showcase all my useless swag.

I was hoping the store would have some more obscure Square-Enix merch, but it was mostly just Expensive and/or Cheap merch. It was still cool, though. Where cool = nerd-cool. Or, as I like to call it, rad maximum.

Except when I was walking along and looked down and realized I was standing on a life-sized Sephiroth. That was kind of creepy.

Next up was dinner Hub the English Pub. I had fish 'n' chips AND shepherd's pie. I thought it was pretty enjoyable. Then we parted ways and returned to our various places of residence.

P.S., no, I don't know where I got the phrase "rad maximum" but, yes, it is the rad maximumest.

P.P.S., I may update this post later tonight (tomorrow morning for you crazy wossnames, Amurrkens) with pictures.

P.P.P.S., and here's a picture of my swag:

From left to right, top to bottom... Chopperman from One Piece, Goku from Dragonball Z, two monsters from Dragon Quest, Moogle from Final Fantasy plush keychain, Slime Knight from Dragon Quest plush, some Dragon Quest arcade battle monster card that they gave me for free or something, Sunny's figurehead from One Piece, an Orange slime from Dragon Quest, and a Slime King down a well from Dragon Quest.

The pattern underneath all that swag is my yukata.

If America had this stuff I would be constantly poor. Thank god for shitty quality American goods and far-too-expensive imported goods. Now I need to find a way to have it all on display for my enjoyment, but also hide it from visitors because this is shameful. Downright shameful.

Happy days

Now here are some anecdotes from the past few days. I hope it will be a thrill ride for the ages. But I expect it will be more like a slight bump in the road while traveling at five miles per hour.

Please to be enjoying my story(s)!

I've spent the majority of my freetime lazing about my apartment. Just kidding, I was being productive! Here's my proof: all the graphics I made for a game! It is called Ijaspy, which stands for It's Just a Simple Platformer, Yo. Because I am creative.

---

On Tuesday evening, though, I went up to Kameido to join Robert and Matt at the Kameido Tenjin Taisai. (Annual Summer Festival of Kameido.) There were supposed to be 1,100 lit lanterns. I did not count them. But it was pretty cool! A very small and quiet "festival". At least on that night. The lanterns, though, were one of the things I wanted to see before I came to Japan. They're in like everything Japanese that I've ever seen in some fashion. And I finally saw it! Lanterns, lining the river! Well, okay, a pond. Shut up.

It was every bit as awesome as I expected. And by that I mean it was a feast for the eyes, but not much else. A night well spent.

---

And last night, I went to Odaiba! While waiting for Matt a Crow sat beside me. I've been trying to get a decent shot of these things since I arrived. I AM SUCCESS.

Matt showed me around the place a bit, and I went and saw the big ol' Gundam, which comes down August 31. It was crowded! At 7pm, the show began. The Gundam turned its head back and forth and steam erupted from mysterious origins!

The Gundam was built for a Green initiative. Environment stuff. In an effort to prove this that didn't involve a giant plastic Gundam model, there was a tent full of trees and beetles. I didn't go in, because it cost 300 yen, but I was able to stand around the back and look inside. The children! They were vicious! One boy picked up a beetle by the head and squeezed the pincers together to pick up another beetle. Jesus! So cruel! There was a pile of beetles where two or three kids kept trying to get the beetles to... I don't know... fight? I guess? Man.

They were big beetles, too. Not like the kind you get back home. If your home is my home.

And then we went to the mall to get something to eat and what did I find but a Jump Shop. Jump is one of the big manga magazines. Home to my personal current favorite: One Piece.

I bou' a li'l su'm su'm. Well, I bought the Laputa robot statue which is in the box and basically impossible to see in Kamakura pre-Kyoto. The Ponyo pins below it came free with the statue. It's a music box! And off to the side is a Chopperman capsule toy I failed to capture in the shot.

And furthermore!

Odaiba has some of the best night shots I've seen since coming to Japan. Man wow.

On the way back from Odaiba, some chick fell asleep on me. Because she was cute and not a big fat smelly mouth breather like the last person who decided I was a pillow on the train, I suffered it. Ohoho. Also she was considerably smaller and at least made an effort to sit up every once in a while, unlike the aforementioned big fat smelly mouth breather who decided I wasn't worth the trouble of being considerate, even when I nearly elbowed him in the side of the head.

When I got off the train I'm not sure how but I sent her cell phone flying. I quickly grabbed it and handed it to her, but she was still half-asleep and would have dropped it if I hadn't given her time to get a good grip. I am so nice! Our gazes locked and nothing else mattered in the world. Then I got off the train.

Naughty me

I have been avoiding writing another blog post after finally finishing the Trip Logs TM, but now I'm back to share my final thoughts.

Kyoto, Himeji, Kobe, Nara, and Hiroshima were awesome. I wish I could've spent more time in all of the cities. At least a week each, if not more. I don't know if there's necessarily a week's worth of stuff to do in all of them, but just being there for a week would be enough. I enjoy the simple act of walking around and absorbing the environment - the people, the buildings, everything.

I discovered some things about myself, too. I have a bizarre fascination with crop fields and trees. On the Shinkansen ride back to Shinagawa, I was watching the rice (and other such crops) pass by, and I just wanted to get off and walk around in the fields, look at things, take pictures. I don't really know... why. Except that ever since I played Harvest Moon on the Super Nintendo Entertainment System, I've always wanted to try my hand at farming (knowing full well, of course, that farming is not a video game).

I once heard about this program wossname where you can go out and work on a Japanese farm for a couple months. At some point, I'm going to have to look into it. I am required to, by law. Probably.

As for trees... I am especially intrigued by the almost-dead trees. Sometimes you walk along and you see a tree trunk that looks like it should've been eaten away years ago. It is decrepit. Ugly, even. But life persists. A branch here or there. Leaves where you would not expect them. I enjoy seeing these things. ):

But more than anything else, I developed this overwhelming urge to walk across Japan. I would probably start in Hokkaido near the end of summer, and work my way down to the bottom at Okinawa. You know, if I ever have the time. Or the money. Or someone to do it with. I really do want to do it, though.

Ahh, pipe dreams.

Not enough time

Because I am a moron, I didn't plan near enough time for Hiroshima. I very much regret it!

But anyway, here is what I did manage to do in Hiroshima: wandered around the Hiroshima Peace Memorial Park, visited the Genbaku Dome, and took a short trip to Miyajima Island.

I did the park and dome last night, after checking into my hotel. too late to visit the museum, but not too late to walk around and absorb things. Tons of memorial statues in and around the park. Lots of origami cranes - I'm not sure if it's always like that or if it's just This Time of Year. It's still pretty close to the anniversary of the bombing, so I dunno...

I could say I was disturbed or deeply moved by the bomb dome. And I kind of was.

But...

Despite my fascination with history, I like to think of the past as the past. We learn from our mistakes and try not to make them again, but is there really any sense in dwelling on them? It was a terrible thing, and certainly the everlasting evidence of past devastation amidst an otherwise thriving city is a juxtaposition of epic proportions. (Is that a sentence or is that a sentence?) But I don't really think we need a reminder of it in our everyday lives.

Eh.

On a more positive note: the area around the dome seemed to be a bit of a romantic spot, ironically. I spied a number of couples sitting on the stone path along the adjacent river. One man seemed to be serenading passersby with a song about I-have-no-idea-it-was-in-Japanese, and another strummed his acoustic guitar beneath the bridge.

Also I figured out how to take night pictures that don't turn out blurry and/or noisy! There's an automated setting just for that! It requires makeshift tripods - a couple coins here and there, a bottle of water to lean against - but if you get the angle right the pictures turn out much better than any I'd taken prior.

I just wish I knew how to do it manually instead of using the automated setting. Or if you even CAN do it manually.

Today, however, was all jove. I went to Miyajima Island! It was... well, I guess it wasn't all jove, because like I said earlier, I didn't plan near enough time. I am disappoint! I walked around the island a bit, ate me some udon, and went to the temple that's built on water. Well, when the tide's high, anyway.

I thought about taking a boat ride to go up close to the tori gate farther out in the water, but moneyyyyy! Instead I took a picture. And while taking that picture, I accidentally pressed a button... wait what my camera has auto-bracketing? SHEEEEIT.

Auto-bracketing is a tool that helps immensely when making HDR photos. Low, normal, and high exposure. Three pictures. Then you do some fancy schmancy tricks in Photoshop or somethin' and put 'em all together for an HDR photo. I love HDR! I used it for the gate. At some point in the future I will attempt to create an HDR photo. I do not know if it will work well because the lighting wasn't too hot, anyway, but!!

Ahem. I would've loved to spend more time there, climbed the mountain (or at least gone up the ropeway), etc. Unfortunately, I simply couldn't. Idiot, idiot! Live and learn.

And now I'm back home. Or, what amounts to my home in Japan, anyway. Tomorrow will be a fabulous day of relaxation and probably working on art for a game!

Witch women

I was in Nara until a few hours ago.

I like Nara! It is a city, for sure, but it does not contain the typical towering monoliths every which way and, I dunno, it is a small city. I like small when it comes to cities!

Last night, I met Kira and we ate katsudon (my first time since coming back from Korea!!) and then wandered around for a while. It was late, so everything was closed! Except for food.

But before that, I walked around in Nara Park for a couple hours, and it was nice. I narrowly avoided deer droppings multiple times.

Speaking of deer droppings... The deer in Nara are protected by law. And also a popular tourist attraction. For a mere buck fiddy, one can purchase a bundle of deer snacks from one of many stalls guarded by elderly women. If one chooses to do so, one will be immediately mobbed by a multitude of deer. What is a group of deer called?

I watched in great amusement as various tourists bought deer snacks and then yelped in surprise.

My question is what the hell voodoo magic are those old women using to ward off the deer horde. I suspect they wield those poop-sweeping brooms with deadly accuracy, but I sadly have no evidence to support my theory.

Ahem.

I also visited a temple, of course. It wouldn't be vacation (apparently) if I didn't visit an old cultural premise every day.

At the temple, I took a picture of something when the sign said no pictures. I'm such a rebel! But then I went to the temple's museum, with a half-empty bottle of Coke in hand. I noticed an exceptional number of guards (or what amounts to guards, I suppose) around the place, and because I was trying to find the right time to sneak more pictures, I made note of where they all were. But getting a picture was impossible. After resolving myself to this, I sighed wistfully and opened the bottle for a sip.

The sound of the carbonation escaping drew the ire of a veritable mob of Japanese museum guards. I think the one actually jumped out of his chair!

In true comedic fashion, I stared wide-eyed and nonchalantly put the cap back on. Satisfied, they returned to their stations, and I awkwardly explored the rest of the displays.

Today, however, I went to see Nara's Big Buddha. So now I've seen... Tokyo's, Kyoto's, and Nara's. I am a certifiable Big Buddha Expert. It was nothing special, I gotta say.

I lie, it was pretty spectacular. And big.

But now I am in Hiroshima, and having rested, I will go out and visit Hiroshima Peace Memorial Park and Genbaku Dome.

Return to Castle Himejistein

Just kidding it was my first time.

My self-guided tour through Himeji Castle was rather uneventful, but it was also long! Longer than most places I visit, at any rate. There was more construction. When I walked through the (...bailey, I think it was called?) some dudes were painting.

Grrr.

I enjoyed touring the grounds, and there was a nice view of Himeji from the top of Himeji castle. Thinking about it now, I would've loved to see the view back when it was first built. I bet it was great. ):

Incidentally, I also lost my sunglasses. It would've been my third pair since coming to Japan! I'm very absent-minded. But after asking a guard, I managed to get them back. Some kind soul handed them to the front desk. Aww.

Just one thing, though: is my Japanese accent really so bad? I couldn't remember how to say "lost" in Japanese, so instead I asked if the guard understoof English. "Sumimasen ga! Eego o wakarimasu ka?" I had to repeat the second sentence several times! I thought it was pretty clear, but I guess I failed.

Later, I ate lunch at a McDonald's and tried me an ebi I mean shrimp filet sandwich. It wasn't bad!

The rest of the day (that is to say, the evening) was devoted to meeting an Internet Friend in Kobe for dinner (delicious udon, which I always love because it is delicious) and a tour of Tits Park. And its butt statue.

A statue.

Of butts.

In Tits Park.

I...

I am just full of stupid, aren't I!

Here I am, last day in Kyoto before I head Kobe-wards, and what have I done? Why, lots!

And by lots, I of course mean more sightseeing, which I'm sure long ago grew dreadfully dull to read about. Perhaps before I started.

I'll be damned if that's going to stop me.

Of particular interest to me, temple-wise, is the Zen Rock Garden. I won't pretend I'm any sort of deep or spiritual human being. Probably quite the opposite, in fact. I'm shallow. I only like the zen rock gardens 'cause they look neat.

I wonder if that makes me a bad person.

Well, today I went to a temple. Ryoanji. (Ji - 寺 - is temple! Some people on the internet persist in referring to the place as Ryoan-ji Temple, but gadgarmit, that's redundant!) It certainly had a nice rock garden! And other nice things.

Unfortunately, my entire experience was ruined by the visual cacophony that is construction-at-work! All that scaffolding!

Side note: I almost died at the temple. I peeked under some scaffolding and around the corner to get a larger look at the Rocks, and felt something on my hair. I backed out and looked up and realized my hair had almost swallowed a spiderweb WITH A SPIDER ON IT.

I surprised myself because I remained perfectly calm and didn't freak out at all.

I swear.

Outside the temple, near the bus stop, there was this area that looked to be a quarry where they carved all those awesome stone lanterns and whatnots found all about the place in Japan. I almost wandered in there, but it sort of looked like I wasn't supposed to. And then I saw someone else (who appeared to be a worker) inside. Basically I chickened out. But man, there were a ton of statues in there. The pictures I took failed to capture the magnitude. Ahhhh well.

And then! I went to the Golden Temple! Forgot all about this place when making sightseeing plans! As in: I didn't even make any plans to go, I just went because I saw it on the map and it was nearby! Goes to show you that making plans ain't all it's cracked up to be.

Only my camera died mid-trip.

Oops.

Decent day, though! Next up: Himeji Castle and Kobe!

Absorbing the station

Today I left the capsule hotel. I completely forgot to take a picture of my box! Ahhh! A shame. ):

Since I had to check out at 10am, and couldn't check into my new hotel until 3pm, I had to waste time. I didn't want to wander around shrines and temples and whatnots carrying my luggage, after all. I chose to find a coffee shop and sit and read for a while! It was fantastic. (Partly because I was exhausted from heavy sightseeing the day prior. I tire easily. What can I say.)

I found a Mister Donut/Cafe du... Monde? I dunno. Some little combo shop at the JR Kyoto station. I devoured a couple donuts and sipped an ice coffee while reading some Discworld.

You can never go wrong with Discworld. Never.

Pulled out my PSP for a bit, too, to continue my ever so slow exploration of the latest dungeon in Grandia. Having rested, recuperated, and otherwise re'd, I decided it was time to head to my new hotel. I'd read enough Discworld and played enough Grandia and eaten enough donuts and drank enough orange juice for the day.

Caught the subway. Got off at the appropriate stop: Shijo station. It's here that I kind of... turned Gomer Pile again. But it wasn't all me, this time!

I wasn't sure where to go, so I walked to a nearby police station and asked for directions. I forgot to write down the address for this hotel, just like the last one, but I was hoping they'd be more helpful than a Family Mart clerk! One of the officers recognized the name and showed it to me on a map. Not far!

I left, and suddenly recalled reading on the website that there were TWO hotels by that name in Kyoto, and so I grew a tad worried. I called Matt hoping he'd be at home and not busy, but he didn't answer. But wait! I can... access the internet on my phone, can't I? Hm. Yeah! I can! Oh.

So getting the address was easy after my revelation. I walked back to make sure it was the same address, and something went terribly wrong.

I don't think the officer knew what she was talking about. She told me to go to Shijo station, and said I'd have to take the subway. But... I came out of Shijo station to get where I was - at the police station. I tried to explain this, but I don't think she understood. After a few more failed attempts at explaining/questioning, I gave up. The one good thing that came out of the encounter: thanks to her calling the hotel, I learned the hotel was near Takashimaya, a big department store.

I interrogated the natives around the area until I found Takashimaya and from there found my hotel with ease.

Boo boo booooo I arrived! A tad early, apparently. The automatic doors wouldn't open. I guess when they say "check in at 3pm" they mean 3:00, and not 2:53. Tch.

I wandered the next-door clothing store to waste time and am happy to report that, yes, I could not find a single shirt or pair of pants that would fit me. ]:

LATER THAT NIGHT

Due to massive communication failures on my part (noticing a trend with failure and me, yet?), I did not have anyone with whom I would see MOUNTAINS ON FIRE. Go me.

It's cool, though. I ended up spending literally two hours just walking around a quiet Kyoto suburb. And by suburb I mean a neighborhood on the other side of a very active street.

It was remarkably quiet, and I saw very few people for what was soon to be a night of MOUNTAINS ON FIRE. Turns out I was just not wandering far enough, as eventually I discovered what was, apparently, the "best" viewing spot? Didn't look so hot to me. I'd found a much better spot to see the mountain's large 大 kanji. In fact, you can see it during the day, even when it's not on fire. My spot was just in the middle of the suburbs on some street.

After walking around in circles for a while, I noticed others congregating near my spot. Time to hunker down, baby.

As I expected, it wasn't a particularly exciting event, like, say, fireworks. Even the Japanese, not exactly known for holding back, didn't express much awe. It was kind of bizarre. There was a little boy who kept singing and marching back and forth across the street. It was adorable, aww.

It was neat, overall, despite the lack of celebration. I got a buuunch of crappy quality pictures. Such is life.

Back at the hotel, my tummy made noises, and my nose led me to McD's. The tamago double mac looked scrumptious.

It was scrumptious.

Daaaamn it was scrumptious.

All I'm sayin' is it's a little hot, okay.

Phew.

At first I did a great job of following the schedule I'd laid out for myself (and by that I mean stolen from some blog somewhere recommending sights to see).

The day began with a trip to Yasaka Shrine. The first item on my list! I arrived, and entered a world of street-side vendors displaying their goods to the passersby. Jesus would've been proud.

It was somehow worse than Asakusa Shrine in Tokyo (and I don't necessarily mean worse in a negative way), because in Asakusa the countless stores have an air of permanence around them, as if they've been around since the dawn of time. (I'll conveniently ignore the last stretch of shops, which generally sell food, and are taken down at the end of each day.) Asakusa stores also form a sort of path leading up to the shrine. At Yasaka, all of the shops look to be constructed anew each morning, and more openly invade the grounds, as it were - creeping along several paths leading inward.

All things come to an end, though, and so did the shops. Deeper in the shrine, more familiar sights could be found. The color orange! Prayers! And on the other side of the shrine, a park, wherein I discovered: an ancient automobile, kept in excellent condition; a weeping cherry tree, looking to be half dead; and a group of Falun Dafa practitioners doin' their thang beneath a sign that read, simply, "Falun Dafa is Good!"

Too at an end was my visit to Yasaka Shrine; I moved on.

It is at this point that I got lost looking for Ishibe-Koji lane! Amidst my confusion, I later realized, I actually walked along it multiple times. I spotted a few geisha, but didn't get any quality pictures of them. Also, I'm not sure if they were "real" geisha or not. I've read that real geisha do not pose for pictures (which makes sense - they have a job to do!), but these geisha did. I didn't see any geisha who didn't. Also, they may have been apprentice geisha (i.e., maiko, as I learned only last week)! On the offchance that they were "real", I did not ask for pictures. I'm not an ass! Also I fear people.

Oh, speaking of geisha, as I was leaving the area to go eat lunch, I spied with my little eye some foreigner following these two geisha. He asked for a picture, and they posed. But then! He followed them for like five minutes. This was on the other side of the street from me, so I was able to see the whole thing. He commented on how hard it must be to walk in those shoes, among other things. It was pretty great!

Next up: Kodai-Ji. Only I took a slight detour and followed a large crowd of Japanese people up a hill. When I reached the top, I suddenly felt awkward and out of place. In front of me lay the largest Japanese graveyard I'd ever seen. I knew this weekend was Obon, and so many families had likely come to Kyoto to tend to their family's graves, as is tradition. So I hear. It was uncomfortable, intruding on these people paying respect to their ancestors. I took one picture of the graveyard before leaving. Had it been any time other than Obon, maybe I would have wandered in and gotten a closer look, but... I didn't want to be That Guy. You know.

So back to my original plan: Kodai-Ji. Therein I found the emptiest Japanese graveyard I've ever seen. So much open space! More grass than grave stones! This being a tourist attraction, I felt no awkwardness at all and got as close as was allowed. Of course! Also of note: paintings of demons of every sort, a zen rock garden, lots of green stuff, and the distant view of my next destination...

Ryozen Kannon. Kyoto's Big Buddha. It was big, there's no denying that! Lower to the ground, off to the side, there was a large golden ball. I watched in bewilderment as several Japanese people dropped some money in a container and touched the ball in prayer. Just one of those things, I guess.

Yasaka Pagoda was next in line! Somewhere, I lost my way, again (read: I couldn't find it). So I gave up and followed this rather large Japanese-style building down an alley-way. I'd been catching glimpses of it all day today and yesterday, and it piqued my interest.

I followed the road and found myself on Sannenzaka Slope. The destination after Yasaka Pagoda. How'd that happen? I dunno.

The Slope is a shopping center of sorts. Tanuki statues, Obon lanterns, and other such decorations line the streets. Here it was more crowded than anywhere else I'd been. Whether it was due to the time of day or the location, I can't say.

At the top of the Slope was Kiyomizudera - not on my agenda, but since I was there, anyway... The temple was larger than the others I'd visited and also on the side of a short mountain. Lots of ground to explore. Great views of Kyoto.

Now exhausted from a day of sightseeing (traveling alone wears me out so fast!), I headed back to Amenity Hotel and crawled into my box.

Here I lay, once again, hijacking the power from the TV to keep my laptop charged. Now I sleep once again. Tomorrow is a new day, and I will go to a new hotel! With a real bed. D:

My first day in Kyoto!

The Shinkansen was an uneventful but delightfully swift experience. I did manage to snag a few shots of the quaint Japanese rurals and rice fields here and there. Most of it will turn out rather lacking in grandeur - of this I have no doubt - but the subject matter was interesting enough to me, nonetheless!

Perhaps more interesting to the casual observer: I partook in a couple Gomer Pile (hah wow has it been a long time since I heard that or what) moments after arriving.

First, I rode the bus. I knew it was the right bus, but when it arrived at my stop, I... uh... I didn't get off. The directions I'd read to the hotel prior to leaving for Kyoto said "get off at the Kiyomizu-do" stop. Up came "Kiyomizu-michi" and then I didn't get off 'cause it wasn't the same name. Oops.

Back at Kyoto Station...

This time I decided to hunt down a bus route map, to be sure. It worked; this time I exited the bus at the proper location.

THEN I looked at the map I'd drawn from-bus-stop-to-hotel. After looking around, I realized my map wasn't going to work so well. I don't know why I thought it would work. It was hastily drawn, and I had absolutely no bearings or landmarks to go by... It also looked to be a considerably longer walk than "one minute from the bus stop."

After interrogating a Family Mart clerk (who, despite his best efforts, was unable to help my stupid ass), I came to the conclusion that the map I'd drawn was for the walk from the TRAIN station and not, in fact, from the bus stop. Oops again.

Luckily, Amenity Hotel turned out to be just a little down the road. A minute, indeed.

I decided not to do any sight-seeing tonight, and instead opted to just wander up and down the street a bit - get the lay of the land, as it were. For dinner, I ate a rather large bentou consisting of fried rice, chicken, uh... other stuff? It was delicious, if that helps?

P.S., I am writing this using hijacked power from the TV in the little corner of the box in which I will later sleep! O:

Leavin' for Kyoto

It's two hours before I leave to get my ass to Kyoto, and I'm still doing some last-minute planning.

I hope my first hotel has internet. I kind of doubt it will, since it's a capsule hotel (!!).

Not much to say, really. I will be traveling a great distance by myself and maybe meeting some people there but also maybe not. I am just happy I'll make it before the mountain gets lit on FIRE. I don't expect it to be the most amazing thing in the world, but I want to see it anyway! And maybe I'll spy some families putting those floating lanterns in the river. I hope so. I'm sure it will be very crowded, though. D:

Other than that, I will surely visit Hiroshima, Kobe, and Nara at least one day each, and Himeji castle, and... some temples and stuff. You know, the usual.

It will be fun!

For now, though, I must return to packing and planning.

Trip planning

I love to procrastinate when it comes to, like most things in life, planning trips.

I plan to go to Kyoto very soon. While I'm out there, I'll possibly be visiting Nara, Kobe and Hiroshima. Most of my time will be spent in Kyoto, I assume - assume because I still haven't finalized, well, any of my plans.

I guess there are temples and stuff and a castle and I even read about a zoo somewhere. Maybe I'll go there?

For now, though, I need to do two important things:

1. Decide when I'm going (as in, exact dates)
2. Reserve a hotel and possibly procure a Shinkansen ticket

Ahhh. Since the skies seem to have cleared up - almost entirely cloud free, now - I should probably go to the nearest JR station and see if I can't get me a ticket. Gonna be money. Maybe I'll look into an overnight bus instead, but I have a feeling it will be so tiny and uncomfortable for me that I may die during the trip. Hmm. Plus I wanna ride the bullet train! Wanna wanna!!

Bowling with demons

I'm not a huge fan of bowling. I enjoy it on occasion, but due to my lack of precision and accuracy when sending that ball down the lane, I never score well. Even so, I agreed to join my coworkers for their monthly bowling excursion. What follows is a horrifying tale of terrifying travesties and frightening foibles...

Last Friday, as work's end draws near, JJF reminds me of the upcoming bowling excursion and beckons me to follow. I oblige. Prior to this day, they had asked my average score, and I answered unashamedly: about 100. Like I said - I am bad. After finding seats on the bus, next to fellow bowlers, he again brings up my score, as if mocking me. But, being a JJF, I know he's not. How could he!

We arrive at the train station and continue our harrowing journey to the bowling alley. Upon arriving, I declare my shoe-size: 32cm. But, uhhh... I try out 32cm and they are way too big. So I put on 31cm. They feel a little too big, still, but I figure I'll give 'em a shot first. I walk over to our 8 or 10 lanes (I forget) reserved for our group. At the moment there is only one other person. He dons his bowling shirt.

JJF returns, now bearing his own bowling shirt. Someone else arrives with donuts. I eat one. It is a donut.

I glance up from my donut and am greeted by an army of my coworkers, all wearing the same bowling shirt, rubbing some crazy chemicals on their fingers, man I don't even know what the what!

A woman arrives and takes a seat at the lane to my left. Her bowling ball is encased in a Hello Kitty wrapping. The pressure is overwhelming! The walls, closing in! Calm down. Caaaalm.

Some kind of voodoo magic shit going on. Yeesh.

We bowl a few practice frames. I manage two strikes. Above average for me. (Usually one a game.) In the first five frames of the first game, I manage to get two gutter balls. On the first throw. Nice.

My boss tells me to relax. Makes a show of rolling his shoulders. RELAX! How the hell am I supposed to relax you've all got some steampunk apparati surgically attached to your wrists what is that gear even FOR?!

Three games. 119. 95. 135. Not bad for me. Phew.

Time to drink.

I <3 my JJF

I have what I like to call my own, personal jovial Japanese fellow.

His name is Kobayashi-san, and he always greets me with a smile.

Every day, at least once, he walks by my desk, slow as a sleeping rabbit, until I notice him. Then he smiles and waves, and walks away without a word. Some days it is as soon as I arrive in the morning, and other days it is almost immediately before I leave.

He also sort of looks ancient, but has the posture and energy of a five year old, and smokes, of course!

Every time there is a work event (whether it is an after-work party, or a during-work festival preparation or perimeter cleaning) he is glad to lead the way and show me how it's done.

When we go drinking, he is always prodding me to try the food, whatever it may be. Or encouraging me in my slowly-developing alcoholic habits.

He is so cheery! It is adorable!

I recommend everyone find their own jovial Japanese fellow to brighten their day. It works wonders for me!

A few anectodes

Last Friday, after working the festival, I was subjected to Japanese wordplay. The Japanese, as far as I can tell from basically every piece of Japanese culture I've consumed since I was born, love their wordplay. Having been drinking for a while, we ordered some food. They wanted me to try raw horse. It was delicious! No, seriously! Really strong flavor, though.

Anyway, うま (uma) is Japanese for horse. うまい (umai) is (when used in this context) Japanese for delicious. "UMA-I!" he exclaimed. Get it? GET IT?

I understood and appreciated the joke, so I laughed. They laughed because I laughed. I laughed because they laughed. We shared laughter. We were drunk.

---

Last night, at the welcoming/farewell party for me/Emily, I was asked to make a Japanese speech. Inebriated beyond understanding English, I had no idea what was being asked of me, so I agreed. Then everyone went silent and realization dawned. I was left speechless, until someone prodded me to say "arigatou." So I said "arigatou." They applauded! Then I was asked to continue. "Gozaimasu?" More applause! A for effort? (What effort?) A few seconds later, I thought of things I could have said. A few seconds after that, Emily gave her own little speech in rapid Japanese and I chuckled silently to myself at my own inability to speak Japanese or even come close to understanding her speech. (She speaks perfect English and I assume also perfect Japanese!)

---

Earlier today, instead of working, I got to go with my immediate boss on a tour of Cisco's customer hardware, including but not limited to a TON of server hardware. The tour ended with a demo of their video conference product, which was pretty rad. It was a bizarre experience, though, as I've never once in my life expected to one day end up participating in a video conference. It's a weird things to specifically expect to never happen, but there it is.

---

After the Cisco tour, I was treated to a meal at Baker Bounce - Real American Flavour. I ordered a chili cheeseburger. It was wonderful.

P.S., Yes: "Flavour."

---

To summarize the past two days: Wednesday night, as mentioned earlier, I went to a welcoming/farewell party. We were almost right on the beach for fireworks! In other words, we were close.

Interestingly, the waves looked to be bigger at this beach (a bay beach) than out in the ocean. Granted, I don't really know much about how waves work - I just expected straight-from-ocean waves to be bigger!

But anyway, it was a great drinking party - again! FYI, taking pictures of fireworks with an alcohol-soaked shaky hand at one-second-long exposures produces some interesting results. Some day, in the future, after I no longer have dial-up, I'll upload the pictures. ):

I held off on drinking too much, though, because I didn't want a hangover today. Luckily, my strategy worked, and I was able to fully enjoy the aforementioned Cisco tour.

Basically this job, even though it's IT and not want I want to do, has already been infinitely more rewarding than my previous co-op experience at DigiLore. I don't know if it's just because it's Japan, or if it's because of this particular group of people... I'd venture to say it's probably both! I am really enjoying it. Life is grand.

Are you jealous?!

This Friday I go bowling, "surprise event"ing, and drinking again! But! For the first time since coming back from Korea, I'll have to pay for the alcohol. ): Noooo!

BLAST FROM THE PAST pt. 4

I still love photography! :D

I alluded to much of what I said here in my first post. I still feel that way, but in a different way. Now I'm used to all the little things. I expect a much bigger culture shock upon returning home. A reverse culture shock, if you will.

Obviously, in the end I got a job after the eight week class. It was all worth it.

03/25/09 - DAY 3 IN JAPAN

It's been three days since I landed in Japan. Well, three and a half. It's time for some real words of wisdom. Still dealing with jet lag, and all his walking around every day certainly isn't helping with the whole early sleep problem I've got.

But who fuckin' cares. I'm not fooling anyone, even myself. Best fuckin' thing I've ever done. On top of visiting another country, I've discovered that yes, for a fact, I really do love photography. Think I'm going to take some sort of photography class to fulfill a BOK requirement or something. Or just shove it in anyway. Also, first things first when I get a real job: invest in a better camera. Point 'n' shoots are great, but sometimes you have more time than that. And during those times...

Yeah. I love it here. Definitely intend to come back some day in the future. Maybe after I graduate from Digipen. Or if I can't get into Digipen, maybe I'll try to do something with JET. Dunno, we'll see.

Strange, though, how I don't really feel like things are out of place. Well, not the big things. Seeing almost nothing but Japanese people almost feels... normal. On the other hand, seeing at least 6 or so black people today down Harajuku street -- when I'd only seen 1 total in all the time before that -- was pretty bizarre.

Anyway, yeah, nothing really Feels That Different, even though I know it is, logically. It's mostly the little things that stand out. Like here, instead of walking on the right, people walk on the left to avoid running into each other. Escalators everywhere -- LINES to these escalators.

Really hate the showers though. Not the fact that they're public -- although I do hate that, too -- but more that they're not constant running water. You have to sit and rinse yourself off and hold the shower head and... yeah.

Nothing feels different, but it all is. Maybe it hasn't really hit me yet because I'm still living in the hostel with 10 other people from my class in America. Maybe it'll hit me after this two-week class is over. Maybe not, since I'll be in another eight-week class, with two of the people from this class. OR maybe I'll have a job if my adviser can get it done.

We'll see.

Work is killing me

...but not because of the actual work.

During the nine months total I worked at DigiLore in quaint Milford, Ohio for my previous co-op, I was invited to a total of one (1) event, which I couldn't attend, due to already having plans.

In a wild contrast sits my first few weeks of working in Japan at GNF; I've been invited to five events and attended four, with another three to come this week alone.

It is a little overwhelming for one of my nature - that is to say, generally adventurous but in a relaxing kind of way. I have never been one to run about looking for parties to attend (though I've never actually turned down an invitation either).

On Friday evening, I participated in hosting the annual GNF festival, held to appease the locals who might otherwise be concerned by the nuclear facility in their neghborhood. In other words, I made yakisoba for a couple hours!

Yakisoba, for the uninitiated, is an easily-prepared and popular festival foodstuff in Japan. Yakisoba means "fried noodles," and contrary to the name does not actually contain soba noodles. You toss some meat on the grill, put some seasoning on it, follow it up with cabbage and other veggies of choice, add the noodles, add the sauce, cooking the whole way. Voila! Easy!

Also delicious.

I got yelled at for working too hard. O: They told me to take a break, eventually, so I did. During said break, one of my coworkers wanted to introduce me to her daughter. No, not like that! She was a little girl, about ten or so. I think she was afraid of me! She was adorable in her little yukata.

While I was working, the festival attendees enjoyed the festivities. Many, like the little girl, were dressed in their yukata, which is always a plus. For the kids, some performers put on a show of Samurai Sentai Shinkenger. There was some traditional dancing, too. Prizes galore. All in all, a good time. I enjoyed myself, even though I was working almost the whole time.

Near the end, I was informed that after we cleaned up, we'd move on to "next stage." After explaining that next stage was drinking, he asked if I wanted to come. Naturally, I said yes!

Let's just say I got drunk again. Drinking with Japanese people is hilarious because before we begin consumption, everything they say to me sounds forced like they're trying to bring me into the fold but are too shy to do so... but then after a few drinks, and a few more, they start asking me what I think of the women I work with and I'm like whoa is that appropriate. Especially when one of them is sitting a mere ten feet away! She came over as soon as the question arose so I ended up not having to answer. (P.S., she's both nice and attractive. Anyway, doesn't matter.)

The night came to a close.

NEXT MORNING - beach time with Matt and Tyler! I love the beach. I want to live on the beach. The beach makes me a happier person. A better, friendlier person! At least that's what Tyler said. His exact words: "I've never seen you this happy before."

I've ridden that train of thought plenty of times before. Thinking about the beach always cheers me up. When I listen to, for example, Jimmy Buffet, I instantly think of the beach and instantly I am a happier man, for the moment. Still! It's not just the beach! It's everything to do with the ocean. When I was a kid, it wasn't computers that I wanted to work with the most. No, no, no! It was definitely underwater photography. I mean, have you seen any of it? So pretty. )': Lately I've been wishing I had stuck with that dream.

But I digress. The day at the beach was wonderful and filled with many bikini-clad Japanese women, whose beauty was only overshadowed by mine. I kid, I kid. I'm hideous!

Good day, though. I swam more on Saturday than I have in ages. I don't swim as much as I'd like to. I'm still a bit sore - though not near as sore as I was after climbing Mt. Fuji. After the day at the beach, we went back to my place for the fireworks party with my fellow residents. Again, there was much drinking to be had. Do I see a pattern emerging?

The night ended, and Sunday was rather uneventful - thankfully. Worn out and hungover.

But Monday brought forth a promise made Friday night. Ramen after work! It was a promise made while drinking that night, so naturally, someone forgot all about it. Not me, of course. I love good ramen.

And holy shit was this good ramen. Easily the best I've ever had. Unlike every ramen meal I've had before, this one came with noodles separate from soup. So there's this gigantic bowl of noodles and this tiny bowl of soup, you dip the noodles in the soup, and go to town. I've had cold soba noodles like that before, but never ramen!

THE BEST. Ramen. I've ever had. !

I consumed my meal much slower than my Japanese counterparts. They most certainly reminded me of the stereotypical anime caricature where ramen is virtually inhaled. It was quite impressive. I glance over and see that their bowls are empty of noodles and mine is still half full. Inwardly, I say "wow." Outwardly, I simply chuckle. Hearing my chuckle, they glance toward me, notice my bowl, and also laugh - perhaps at me, perhaps with me. Or both.

I've got the technique down! The secret is to both slurp AND use chopsticks. This also helps prevent the mess of liquid flying every which way as the noodles flick and twirl. It's just the speed I can't handle, yet. If I go too fast, that control slips away and the mess returns.

I am given a ride home, and after a hastily mumbled arigatou gozaimasu, I exit the car and return to my room, once again satisfied with a night well spent. Only this time there's no hangover to look forward to the following morning!

My only regret is that I took no pictures on Friday or Monday (on account of I don't take my camera to work). Yes, I still have the memories, but goddamn if there weren't some good photographic opportunities.

Desire to improve

I've been very, very slowly uploading pictures from my first few weeks in South Korea...

They kind of suck. ): It occurs to me that I was focused too much on simply getting a picture, and not getting the picture. Which sounds dumb when I think about it, but that's the way things are.

In an effort to improve, I've been looking at photos all over the world wide web and reading about photography in general, especially at Ken Rockwell's personal website. I'd never heard of him until I started researching what new camera I might want, but he's apparently a pro and seems to know his stuff! I have no real desire to be a professional photographer, but I figure reading tips from one will help me to improve.

Actually, that's not really true... I'd love to be a professional photographer, but I know that it's just not something I could do... maybe. At any rate, it's a little late to all of a sudden change my life goal. And besides, being a non-professional gives me more freedom... right?

Back to the main point: I want to get better.

I definitely feel like I've improved since arriving in Japan (which signaled the beginning of my photography adventures). However, looking at those pictures of random food stuffs makes me second guess that improvement.

Granted, packaging isn't all that exciting to look at in the first place. I know this. I also know that the pictures I take with more interesting subjects almost always turn out better. So maybe I should just stop taking pictures of food packaging!

Ah, but even so, when I look at pictures from more skilled photographers, I can tell they are way better than me when it comes to setting up a good shot... lighting, angles, etc. Way, way better.

Maybe I should just go out one day with the singular goal of finding and taking good photos. Usually I am distracted by something else during my trips: people, destinations, food... anything. If I remove those extra goals, maybe I can take the time to experiment and find the photos I want to take, find out how to get the right picture. Which would then enable me to get those pictures even when I'm distracted. Hmm.

Hopefully I will improve.

I plan to get a new camera, but I'm well aware that doing so won't automatically make my pictures better. New gizmos make everything fun!

More work quirks from a duder made of quarks

Today I did my presentation. I'm willing to admit that it was terrible, but the people to whom I presented were unwilling to spout anything but extreme positivity! I probably spoke waaaay too fast for them (I presented in English to a bunch of native Japanese speakers). I tried to go slow, but my nerves of fail proved their merit once again.

Quirks of the day:

• Wednesday is designated non-overtime day. I, personally, am amused that such a day of the week exists. Sometimes, other days will be declared similarly non-overtime - last Friday, for example!
• I found out what the 3pm bell and music is for. Exercise time! Taisou o shimashou!
• Tomorrow is the company festival. I've been contracted to help put together the yakisoba and shaved ice booths! I guess the IT section handles these particular booths.
• Also, I swear the guard out front has a riot shield. I wonder when they ever have to worry about riots. O:

oh geez

Two nights ago was perhaps one of the more genuine Japanese experiences I've had in the past four months.

It was a welcoming party for me and two other gaijin to the company dormitory. (The other two had actually been here for two months already, and if I understand correctly are going back to America in only a couple weeks. A little late, p'rhaps?)

It was a drinking party. Nomihoudai. All you can drink. Along with several courses of tofu-centric dishes. Some shabu shabu. It was all good food. Would eat again. But the drinking, goddamn. PROTIP: if you don't want any more, do not empty your glass. Probably seems obvious, right. I just have a habit of always eating or drinking what's in front of me.

I'm having a hard time remembering it all. But, uh, I remember some things.

Apparently, for a "massage" I should go to the Mos Burger street late at night.

At one point I was asked if I liked American girls or Japanese girls. I answered truthfully: both. They found this hilarious. "At least you answered honestly!" Oh! Okay no problem!?

Later on, they asked if I had a girlfriend. I again answered thruthfully: no. Then they broke out in rapid Japanese conversation for a few minutes. I don't know what that means.

But hey, after much drinking, it was time to go. So go we did; up and outta there. I didn't have to pay, 'cause they were awesome and it was my welcome party I guess!

Upon leaving the building, I don't remember much. I think they asked if I liked karaoke, and I probably said yes, and maybe I like The Beatles... it's all very fuzzy. A typical drunken stupor.

But then! This old lady emerged from some deep, dark cave, eyes alight with greedy delight at the prospect of luring our drunken souls into her den. Therein, she would proceed to drain us for all our worth! Well, all their worth. Once again, they told me I didn't have to pay a dime. Or yen, as the case may be. I was only too happy to oblige, considering I don't think I could have counted out the money I needed at that point.

We followed her inside a building, and I was informed this was a karaoke bar where the girls sit with you and pour you drinks while you enjoy the karaoke. We sat. Girls surrounded us. I was told "that girl is going to sit between us" so I stood and let her sit between us!

I vaguely remember selecting and singing The Beatles, Come Together in a super hoarse and completely terrible voice. I more vividly remember singing Green Day, Basketcase with one of the guys I was with. I very vividly remember the lyrics on the screen being wrong. Reason being, back when I was super into Green Day, I remember the lyrics in the CD booklet ALSO being wrong. For one line in particular. Or at least it always sounded wrong to my ears. Maybe Billy what's-his-face just slurred the hell out of it. "Am I just paranoid? I'm just stoned!" always sounded more like "Am I just paranoid? Am I just stoned?!" to me!

Anyway, aside from that, I only remember one other thing at the place. They kept pointing to the woman "between us" and shouting "your mother, yo mazaa!" I think. When I finally figured out they were saying it, I asked why, and they asked how old my mother was.

D:

Then we walked back to the apartment building and to our respective rooms. I remembered harrassing internet denizens unashamedly for about ten minutes before I passed out. Oh boy.

Long story short: I was drunk, in Japan, with Japanese people, on a Tuesday evening. Hurray! (?)