I wanna be a real boy!

Well, it's been a while since I wrote anything. I had intended to write some proverbial Final Thoughts or some shit regarding my extranational experiences much sooner than this, but the world turns as the world turns and sometimes it just don't turn for you!

So here goes.

Japan is probably the best thing that has ever happened to me...

Let me start again.

Japan is undoubtedly the best thing that has ever happened to me. I remember when I first signed up for this ICP nonsense, it was kind of half-heartedly. I always knew I'd eventually be going to Japan, and I knew I had to keep above a 3.0 GPA to be eligible. I did it, and I made it. But even with all the problems I had getting a job prior to leaving the country, and getting my passport, and packing, and and and and... AND-- It bit me in the ass. I don't know how, but I just really didn't feel it coming until I was already landing.

And then I was in Japan. I've talked enough about my experiences. No doubt as I catch up with everyone they'll ask me questions and I'll mumble and attempt to traverse my terrible memory until they walk away disappointed...

Alas! That's not why I'm writing NOW at THIS MOMENT IN TIME.

Japan changed me. Not in an immediately obvious way, and especially not in an outward way. I no doubt still appear to be the same shy guy who lacks any significant amount of confidence, but inside I am different! I promise. I'm more confident - this isn't something I had a problem with before, but people often equate shyness with lack of confidence. Nonetheless, I am more confident now.

More importantly, I've gotten over one of my greatest character flaws: lack of motivation. For the longest time I had no real desire to do anything, and I spent a lot of time moping about wondering why oh why I couldn't find the desire to do things. Oops. The solution? Just fucking do it, idiot.

I'm not sure when or how it happened or what the catalyst was in Japan, but at some point while I was over there, I just realized that I did not think about it anymore. How excellent! I started doing pixel art for fun (this was in Korea, when I had a lot more time for it and didn't feel exhausted after work). I started really planning out a game with My Good Buddy. We've made it a lot further than we ever have before and soon I'll continue with my part of the project -once I get a fucking desk. (Motivation or not, a few piles of boxes does not make for a comfortable working desk. Ironically, I still suffer through it for vidya gaems. Clearly I've still got priority issues!) Photography, traveling, outdoorsy things - I discovered/rediscovered loves for all these and more.

I am excited about life.

So. Yeah. Thanks, Japan!