I once knew a wizard.

From the woods he came, offering sage advice in numerous and wonderful subjects, including the art of ninjutsu, how to replace a lost thumb, and the magic of disguising yourself in the foliage.

The first time I met this mysterious wizard, he was dressed in hunter's attire - the kind that hides you from your prey, rather than highlight your presence for fellow hunters. One second there was nothing, and the next, the shadows twisted as he flowed outward from beneath a nearby tree. I cowered in fear, but my father addressed the wizard by name. All was well, then! They appeared to be on friendly terms, so my fear ebbed away. Adam was his name. They conversed for a time and then the wizard melted back into the foliage.

The next time I remember seeing Adam, he was garbed as a ninja. All black clothing, a mask. No doubt he had throwing stars hidden about his person. I cannot recall if he carried a katana or any other sort of blade. No doubt he at least had one in his possession, if not on his person! Enchanted by eldritch means, stored in some dark cellar for when the time was right. After another conversation with my father, he disappeared once again.

When that time he went away, it left me wondering what new fantastic profession he would next take up. Sadly, nothing ever topped the ninja.

And so more time passed. My next clear memory of the wizard was less exciting and more awe-inspiring. If I recall correctly, he was dressed in normal attire. Jeans and a T-shirt, an appropriate dress code for a walk through the woods. But his hand was entirely covered by bandages. Through conversation with my father - again I remained silent, for I was even more shy then than I am now - I learned that he lost his thumb when his potato gun backfired. I suspected it was something more mystical in nature, but my father bought the story. When they finished speaking, he traipsed off into the forest once again.

If anyone doubts my story, there is one more encounter... Proof of his magical nature lies in this final confrontation, the last that is not lost in the clouds of my forgotten past.

He had a thumb! His excuse this time? Toe-to-thumb surgery. As if such a thing even exists! I know it was magic that healed his severed appendage.

Between that encounter and my move to a new home in Lebanon, I only recall seeing Adam once more, and it was not an eventful meeting. But no doubt had I ever built up the courage to speak with him, I would have been witness to a whole new world.

...

When I was a child, Adam was nothing but awe-inspiring. He only ever appeared from the woods behind my old house, and when the conversations between him and my father ceased, he would stalk back into the foliage, not to be seen again for weeks or even months. His visits were brief and few.

I learned only recently that Adam was, in fact, mentally ill. Dad didn't say exactly how - I'm not sure if he knows, and I didn't inquire any further. Strangely, this doesn't affect my mental image of Adam at all. He was what he was. A strange and mysterious figure.

Fond memories of a time not long passed

"not long past" what a terrible mistake

For a disproportionately large segment of my life, there was no past time in my life which I really, truly wanted to relive. Elementary school? I had friends in the beginning, but they all moved away and I was essentially alone for the remainder. Beside that, I was too young to really... care. Not a time I remember fondly. High school? Things improved, but not nearly enough that I would ever want to go back. Not that anyone would want to go back to high school, anyway. My early college years? As I sit here contemplating my swiftly approaching graduation, I am unequivocally excited to get it over with and move on with my life... to more school (whatiswrongwithme). Up until recently I was still in what I thought would be my eternally apathetic phase.

Then I went to Japan.

It really was the best time in my life. Daily reminders of the things I did there send pangs of nostalgia shivering down my spine. I desperately yearn to return! Despite some of the troubles I had getting there... despite some of the things I missed back here at home... despite some of the things I actually did not like in Japan... despite it all, I feel like I was perfectly content there.

It is an extremely rare occasion, now, that a day goes by where I am not assaulted by that nostalgic shock. And it doesn't necessarily have to be a particularly spectacular event that strikes me.

For example, walking to the shuttle stop on my way to classes, my mind naturally wanders to the countless similar trips I made to the train station from my apartment in Japan. The difference? It's hard to describe. I do know that in Japan I enjoyed strolling down the street. I enjoyed the sights, the sounds, the smells (mm-mm that delicious ramen aroma). And it's not as if I actively dislike walking to my shuttle, but, well, 1) it is a very short walk and 2) I would never say that I live in a desirable neighborhood. I doubt that anyone could live down here and say that with a straight face. Beside that, I used to just walk around for fun in Japan. I would never do that here.

Japan: 1, America: 0

More than that, though, what about the shuttle ride itself? I get on for ten minutes, and get off. The seats face the front of the bus, as opposed to the opposite wall like they would on most trains in Japan. There is no real reason to leave a lot of free space in the shuttle because, unlike the trains, it is very rare that you stand during the trip. It's not really fair to compare the shuttle, a school-operated transportation system, to the trains, a public transportation system. However, there was a time I rode the RTA, Dayton's public buses. It was never a pleasant experience. I feel like I can safely say that those buses are a vastly inferior experience to the trains in Japan. Why would that be? Simple: in Japan everyone rides the trains. In Dayton those buses were infested with unsavory creatures. (Uh-oh, I'm gettin' a little offensive here.) The people on the trains in Japan were entirely different! I laughed at the metrosexual dude making his hair look just the right kind of messy by using his DS as a mirror. I was assaulted by a friendly passenger every now and then asking me what I was doing in Japan. I smiled in quiet contemplation at the kid sitting contentedly between his two sleeping grandparents on their ride home from a day out as he used his DS for its intended purpose. The people!

Japan: 2, America: 0

Speaking of the people: the people! I don't know what it is about Japan, but the culture there just fascinates me. And I'm not even talking about anime and video games! The history of Japan is just so much deeper and more interesting than that of America. It makes me feel dirty saying it, as I despise, nay, loathe, the stereotypical Japanophile, but goddamn. Japan has had thousands of years to develop their culture, and even today, in 2010, they're still rather closed-off from the outside world. Sure, they've got a McDonald's on every street, but they still manage to retain their uniqueness. The countless festivals I experienced are a testament to that. Sure, we have our own culture festivals, but they're generally taken and adapted from other cultures. America is called a melting pot for a reason.

Japan: 3, America: 0

THREE STRIKES. YOU'RE OUT.

Could a lot of this have to do with mindset? Undoubtedly. Japan was an exciting place for me, even after six months when I left. Every day I would notice something new, something interesting. America is where I grew up. It's "old hat," as they say. Plus, since then, as I've no doubt stated previously on this here bloggy thing, I have been much more open to new experiences period. Life has quite simply been better since I went to Japan. Was it Japan, though, or just "one big new experience" paving the way for more, in some grand, spiritual example of the domino effect? I suspect the latter.

Could it also have to do with where I stayed in Japan? Where I am NOT living in America? It's more than a mere possibility! My first apartment in Japan wasn't exactly the greatest place in the world, but a mere floor below were two friends and a mere twenty-minutes walk away was the train station and access to the entirety of Tokyo. My second apartment was fantastic. Great view, great area, great neighbors... great greatness. Here in the real world, I look forward to my (hopefully) inevitable move to Redmond, Washington, simply because from what I know of the place, it's beautiful. In my head it's full of sunshine and rainbows! Maybe even unicorns!

Whatever the reasons may be, the fact is that I want to go back, goddamnit! I wonder if I'll ever have the chance?

Catching up with myself.

So, it has been almost two months since I last spoke of my life on this web log of mine, not counting the Teegip just below this post. What to talk about...

For Christmas, I received a sketchpad and some drawing pencils. I made an effort to draw every day, and kept up with it for a whole eight days! Then my apartment got messy and I got lazy. I dropped out of that short-lived habit.

For Christmas, I did not receive my so-desired Nikon D40 DSLR with which I had planned to photograph any wild number of things for my viewing pleasure. My fam's po' so I gotta wait 'til tha cashflow begin again, y'know.

For Christmas, I did not make light bulb terrariums for my mother and grandmother as I had planned to do. Moss is a surprisingly hard thing to find in the dead of winter. Alas!

After Christmas, and after New Year's Day, classes began anew. Only six months left until I graduate, if all goes well. I also took the GRE in an effort to get the ball rolling on my application to DigiPen.

Over Martin Luther King, Jr. Day weekend, I went to New Hampshire with ten other members of the mountaineering club. Despite my doubts I could make it to the top of Mt. Washington, I let my friends talk me into going, and I had an extremely good time of it. I did not, in the end, make it to the top. But I will some day.

Last weekend, I went to an overnight thing at the Cincinnati Zoo, hosted by a friend. Normally it is a thing for little kids, but... so what?! It was a cool look behind the scenes at the zoo, and she is probably the best tour guide under which I have had the pleasure of touring. I was hoping to get a little more up close and personal with some of the animals, but I also knew that was hoping for too much. It would be dumb to let just any person get that close.

That about sums up what I've done. Now for what I plan to do!

The first priority deadline for DigiPen's application process is February 1. I now simply await the deliverance of my transcript and letters of recommendation, and everything will be there. Nothing to do but wait, and hope that if they do accept me, they also offer a scholarship. It's about the only thing in my life in which I no longer have an active role.

Next week on Tuesday I will go on a night hike. Excite! I hope it is not cloudy. Nothing worse than a cloudy night. Especially when you make the effort to get outside the city to an area where the sky is free(er) of light pollution!

Every day for the past week or so, I swore to myself I would start falling into the habits I want to follow. I want to write something on this blog at least once a week. I want to draw something every day, to get better. I want to start running, or doing something active, every day. I want to stay up to speed with my studies instead of lagging behind horribly like I did last quarter. I want to start cooking meals instead of nuking them; I want to make that damn egg salad and mabo dofu for which I have had the ingredients for weeks. I might even want to start practicing the bass guitar a little every day! I do not have it in my apartment, though. I should make a note somewhere to get it from mom...

Habits are hard things to start, and harder to stick to if they are still new!

Tonight I drew some crap in my sketchpad. When I say crap, I really mean I drew some stuff that is not good. But there is only one way to become good. At the moment, I am following this book that my grandmother got me with the sketchpad. It is supposed to teach me how to draw graphite landscapes. Some of those techniques are far more difficult to perform than I thought they were. I think I am getting better?

I have been sick lately (again), and so did not go to class or work out today as I had planned. Before going to bed, I might to try out this burpee thing I read about... it is supposed to be pretty good workout, and without lifting any weights or anything. I might not, though. As I mentioned, I'm pretty sick. I feel terrible. C'est la vie.

Interestingly, I do not have that strong desire to play video games I thought I would have all my life. I still enjoy them immensely when I have the time to play them, but... I just do not have that time, anymore. Not with everything else I want to do. And everything else I have to do for school.

I am a busy man, apparently. When the hell did that happen? D:

Teegip: Mirror's Edge

Just realized I've had this sitting around for a while now and never clicked "Publish Post." So here goes! Edited to be a little more accurate for my current circumstances.

No one will every figure out what Teegip means. And that is okay.

On Black Friday (and then again around Christmas) there was a sale on that video game digital distribution hub we all know and love, Steam. I nabbed a ton of games for anywhere from $2 to $9.99 - though I probably shouldn't have, even at those prices. I am a little tight on the money.

At any rate, one of the games I purchased was Mirror's Edge, for the low low price of $5.00. A mere tenth of its PC release price. A deal? Fuckin' right. It is not a long game, but it was one of the most exhilarating experiences I have had in the gaming world in a long time. (Where long means since before I went to Japan.)

WARNING: SPOILERS, KIDS. Step away from this blog post if you have yet to play this game that came out last eon.

Behold: the title screen.

This is where it all begins.

I suppose, in the interest of fairness, that I should point out that I had been waiting for this game to go on sale for a while. Not because I did not think it was worth full price, but because Steam sales have spoiled me. As such, there can be no doubt I am slightly biased and trying to justify my purchase, or finding beauty where there is none.

lol j/k it was five bucks, dudes

The game begins, as most games these days, with a tutorial. An unfortunate necessity, I suppose.

But then you play the game.

Some cutscene somewhere.

The colors! One might argue that environments of Mirror's Edge, with their heavy use of primary colors and White, look quite sterile. One might be stupid. Goddamn refreshing.

And here I am sliding down a zipline, about to land on the next roof!

This game makes me feel awesome.

A truly frightening leap.

Death-defying stunts lie around every corner. I would be scared shitless if I had to do this in real life. Not least because it is completely and totally insane.

FLYING DRAGON KICK.* Enemy hidden behind lower body. *Not the actual name.

I even love the combat. A lot of people do not. They are dumb. It is fun, as long as you do not charge in headfirst.

But I charged in as such anyway. Because I am awesome.

Exploring a building's innards.

Even the indoor areas offer excitement. This is another common complain apparently. The populace does not approve of the indoors. What is wrong with the populace? I submit that they are dumb. Oh, have I already said that? Good.

About to take on some snipers.

The shifts in color are sudden, but effective. Also this part was badass. Weaving in and out of cover to avoid the numerous snipers and make one last desperate leap before breaking through the final door to safety... Good times.

Nearing the end.

It is nearly time to win the game. Once on the roof, I will watch some boring cutscene, then leap off the roof to catch the railing above the helicopter door and kick the bad guy in the face and laugh as he flies backward screaming in the agony of imminent death.

Unfortunately everything past the leap is scripted, but it was still awesome!

BOOM hangonkatehangon

I won! Kate, don't fall! Oh wait, I don't really care; I just like this screenshot.

The end.

What's that? What about the flaws? Of course Mirror's Edge had flaws, but no one cares. Go away, child.

Mirror's Edge gets a banana.

I have a rice cooker

I have a rice cooker. I have had a rice cooker for a little over a month now, it must be. I use it to cook rice! It is also possible to steam veggies 'n' things using the rice cooker. You can even do it while you cook the rice! If you want!!

I have actually only used it three times total since I got it. Not because I'm lazy or anything, but because I don't have a convenient place to plug it in. My little kitchenette has no outlet. Unlike my friend's apartment just down the hallway. He has an outlet. His outlets also have three holes - that is to say, ground. None of my outlets have three holes. They all have two holes.

I think my hardwood floor is also older than his.

I would like to use the rice cooker more. I would like to know how to prepare an actual meal, too, instead of just a bowl of rice. I mean, don't get me wrong; a bowl of rice is pretty great! But as a meal it is rather bland, yes? Maybe I could teach myself how to make sushi. I'd love some sushi right about now.

But enough about sushi! Let's talk about my cooking abilities.

They are essentially non-existent. I can make pancakes using Bisquik. I can fry an egg. I can... well, that about sums it up. I don't consider using the rice cooker a skill. Maybe you do. I don't. Oh, I did make some tacos. Rather simple tacos, mind you, but tacos nonetheless. It wasn't very difficult. Thaw meat in microwave, throw on pan, fry 'til not pink, add seasoning, stir, fry a little more. Once the meat was done I nuked a tortilla shell for a few seconds and wrapped some meat and cheese in it. Repeat until full. Not difficult, still tasty.

But not tasty enough.

I'm thinking about trying my hand at egg salad. It looks simple enough. I just need to procure the ingredients. I also really, really want to eat some mabodofu - it is my favorite Chinese dish that is available in Japan and not available in America. I think I'll try to make that, too...

I have a rice cooker. It is the beginning of the end. Further posts on this topic will be less boring. I promise.

P.S., I totally made some biscuits earlier, using one of those ready-to-bake Pillsbury things, and it exploded on me when I opened it because I forgot I had it out of the fridge for a while. I am going places.

Something different

[jonzo] hey i wanna write about something
[jonzo] give me a topic
[axord] write about going back to japan to sucba dive in caves
[axord] caves found ON TOP OF MNT FUJI

Such an activity would probably be the pinnacle of all activities. The epitome of sheer cool. The ultimate in badassery.

I don't think anyone could argue this. Unless they are a fun-hater. Are you a fun-hater? I didn't think so.

The other day I was hangin' out with me mams and somehow the topic of space came up. I don't remember why. I told her I wanted to go to Mars and that if I did, I could die happy. She seemed shocked by this and took it pretty seriously... And although I meant it to be taken in a humorous fashion (as I am quite the joker), I was being serious after a fashion.

I don't fear dying. I don't fear much at all, really. I'm ready to live life to the fullest. (Inasmuch as I, personally, enjoy life.) However! I still wish I could live forever. When I think about all the things I won't see in humanity's future simply because I won't be alive, it bothers me significantly.

What is going to happen to humanity? Will we kill each other off? Will we finally find peace? These are the boring questions. No one with an imagination like mine gives two measly wossnames about that nonsense. The real question is this: What will we find out there? Other intelligent life forms? Or are we completely alone? Either way, we can at least spread out, explore, terraform and oh man I'm getting dizzy just thinking about it.

Space. It's awesome. And, granted, there's still a lot we don't know about our own planet. We have yet to dive to the deepest depths of the ocean. New species of land animals are still being discovered all the time. There's also all that stuff we don't know about us. There is much to learn. But, at least for me, the most exciting thing we can do, the thing that yields the largest potential, is exploration. Oh, to be alive in the days of yore when those brave souls sailed across the Atlantic Ocean and discovered the Americas. Can any of us really imagine what that must have been like? Of course not! With the rare exception of those who have been in space, I imagine.

So, back to Mars. Will we land on that glorious red planet and at last find evidence of an ancient Martian civilization? Uh, most likely not. But it is the next obvious step. Let's get the fuck out there and stop meandering down here on Earth, eh?

SPACE: THE FINAL FRONTIER.

I would absolutely jump at the chance to go to Mars. Without hesitation, and even if it meant I would never be coming back. Not only would it mean I had accomplished something huge with my life, but it would also hopefully be the catalyst for the human species to open their eyes and look to the stars once more.

Dream Big, Jonny Boy.

Of course, all this is moot because I'm too fucking tall to be an astronaut. Thanks NASA. (Go go privately-owned-and-operated space exploration!)

The new me in the old world

Sheeeit, mang. Who am I? Where am I? what am I doing? It's like a whole new world! I am doing things this year I never thought I'd be doing when I started college. Always have been a bit of a, uh, what is it... socially inept sort of fellow? I'm probably still awkward but at least I don't care anymore. Well, mostly. Of course, I have Japan to thank for that. Old news. Old. News.

The point is, I went caving last weekend with UC's Mountaineering Club. But I'm a little too... shall we say husky for it. I couldn't fit into the crawlspaces with everyone else, so while they were off exploring, I was stuck waiting in the dark cave alone. Which, in itself, was kind of a cool experience. For a while I had my headlight on, but then I figured why waste the battery, and turned that sucker off. (Actually it was just to get rid of all the fucking bugs flying around my goddamn head.) I've never been in pitch blackness before! Actually, I have to be honest. There was a small point of very dim light that pointed to the entrance to the cave... But other than that I couldn't see a damned thing! I could hear shit, though. Drip drip goes the water. And I think I heard cave crickets crawling around my head - there was some weird sound I couldn't identify, but that's my best guess.

It was bizarre.

Anyway, yeah, I couldn't fit in the crawlspaces. Or at least I felt like I couldn't. Maybe I could've fit through at least one of them, if I forced my way through, but I felt pretty good and stuck before I was even halfway, and I guess I was afraid I wouldn't be able to get BACK through. I'm not claustrophobic by any stretch of the imagination, but... hey. It was a new thing for me. I'm allowed to be a frightened little child.

What I'm trying to get at here is that this is the first time my weight (that is to say, my overweight, my physical girth) has actually impeded on my ability to enjoy life. I mean sure, because I'm out of shape, I might get tired easier than other people, but it's never outright prevented me from doing something. It was... kind of depressing. It's not even like I'm ginormous, either, I'm just too big for the wossnames, you know.

I really was excited for caving, too. It's one of those things I've always wanted to do.

I wonder, though, if I'm just too big even if I was in shape. I'm not a small guy! I mean, 6'4" is nothing to scoff at! Who knows. The only way to find out is to get in shape, and that's what I've been working on since the school year began (albeit sporadically - I really should stick to the fucking schedule, eh?).

On a happier note, I'm second in the reserve line for the trip to Mt. Washington this February. Only second! I should probably be bummed I'm in the reserves and not going on the trip, since unlike a lot of people in the club, I am a senior. However, senior or not, I'm still new to the club. Shit go down like shit go down. Besides, it's probably better if I don't go. 1) I'm broke. 2) I dunno if I could handle the trip in my shape. 3) It'd be happening right in the middle of when I should be working on my senior design project.

Three great excuses to not be sobbing myself to sleep. Good enough for me.

Life is grand, ain't it? (This is not a sarcastic remark, despite what the context may imply.)