Catching up with myself.

So, it has been almost two months since I last spoke of my life on this web log of mine, not counting the Teegip just below this post. What to talk about...

For Christmas, I received a sketchpad and some drawing pencils. I made an effort to draw every day, and kept up with it for a whole eight days! Then my apartment got messy and I got lazy. I dropped out of that short-lived habit.

For Christmas, I did not receive my so-desired Nikon D40 DSLR with which I had planned to photograph any wild number of things for my viewing pleasure. My fam's po' so I gotta wait 'til tha cashflow begin again, y'know.

For Christmas, I did not make light bulb terrariums for my mother and grandmother as I had planned to do. Moss is a surprisingly hard thing to find in the dead of winter. Alas!

After Christmas, and after New Year's Day, classes began anew. Only six months left until I graduate, if all goes well. I also took the GRE in an effort to get the ball rolling on my application to DigiPen.

Over Martin Luther King, Jr. Day weekend, I went to New Hampshire with ten other members of the mountaineering club. Despite my doubts I could make it to the top of Mt. Washington, I let my friends talk me into going, and I had an extremely good time of it. I did not, in the end, make it to the top. But I will some day.

Last weekend, I went to an overnight thing at the Cincinnati Zoo, hosted by a friend. Normally it is a thing for little kids, but... so what?! It was a cool look behind the scenes at the zoo, and she is probably the best tour guide under which I have had the pleasure of touring. I was hoping to get a little more up close and personal with some of the animals, but I also knew that was hoping for too much. It would be dumb to let just any person get that close.

That about sums up what I've done. Now for what I plan to do!

The first priority deadline for DigiPen's application process is February 1. I now simply await the deliverance of my transcript and letters of recommendation, and everything will be there. Nothing to do but wait, and hope that if they do accept me, they also offer a scholarship. It's about the only thing in my life in which I no longer have an active role.

Next week on Tuesday I will go on a night hike. Excite! I hope it is not cloudy. Nothing worse than a cloudy night. Especially when you make the effort to get outside the city to an area where the sky is free(er) of light pollution!

Every day for the past week or so, I swore to myself I would start falling into the habits I want to follow. I want to write something on this blog at least once a week. I want to draw something every day, to get better. I want to start running, or doing something active, every day. I want to stay up to speed with my studies instead of lagging behind horribly like I did last quarter. I want to start cooking meals instead of nuking them; I want to make that damn egg salad and mabo dofu for which I have had the ingredients for weeks. I might even want to start practicing the bass guitar a little every day! I do not have it in my apartment, though. I should make a note somewhere to get it from mom...

Habits are hard things to start, and harder to stick to if they are still new!

Tonight I drew some crap in my sketchpad. When I say crap, I really mean I drew some stuff that is not good. But there is only one way to become good. At the moment, I am following this book that my grandmother got me with the sketchpad. It is supposed to teach me how to draw graphite landscapes. Some of those techniques are far more difficult to perform than I thought they were. I think I am getting better?

I have been sick lately (again), and so did not go to class or work out today as I had planned. Before going to bed, I might to try out this burpee thing I read about... it is supposed to be pretty good workout, and without lifting any weights or anything. I might not, though. As I mentioned, I'm pretty sick. I feel terrible. C'est la vie.

Interestingly, I do not have that strong desire to play video games I thought I would have all my life. I still enjoy them immensely when I have the time to play them, but... I just do not have that time, anymore. Not with everything else I want to do. And everything else I have to do for school.

I am a busy man, apparently. When the hell did that happen? D:

The new me in the old world

Sheeeit, mang. Who am I? Where am I? what am I doing? It's like a whole new world! I am doing things this year I never thought I'd be doing when I started college. Always have been a bit of a, uh, what is it... socially inept sort of fellow? I'm probably still awkward but at least I don't care anymore. Well, mostly. Of course, I have Japan to thank for that. Old news. Old. News.

The point is, I went caving last weekend with UC's Mountaineering Club. But I'm a little too... shall we say husky for it. I couldn't fit into the crawlspaces with everyone else, so while they were off exploring, I was stuck waiting in the dark cave alone. Which, in itself, was kind of a cool experience. For a while I had my headlight on, but then I figured why waste the battery, and turned that sucker off. (Actually it was just to get rid of all the fucking bugs flying around my goddamn head.) I've never been in pitch blackness before! Actually, I have to be honest. There was a small point of very dim light that pointed to the entrance to the cave... But other than that I couldn't see a damned thing! I could hear shit, though. Drip drip goes the water. And I think I heard cave crickets crawling around my head - there was some weird sound I couldn't identify, but that's my best guess.

It was bizarre.

Anyway, yeah, I couldn't fit in the crawlspaces. Or at least I felt like I couldn't. Maybe I could've fit through at least one of them, if I forced my way through, but I felt pretty good and stuck before I was even halfway, and I guess I was afraid I wouldn't be able to get BACK through. I'm not claustrophobic by any stretch of the imagination, but... hey. It was a new thing for me. I'm allowed to be a frightened little child.

What I'm trying to get at here is that this is the first time my weight (that is to say, my overweight, my physical girth) has actually impeded on my ability to enjoy life. I mean sure, because I'm out of shape, I might get tired easier than other people, but it's never outright prevented me from doing something. It was... kind of depressing. It's not even like I'm ginormous, either, I'm just too big for the wossnames, you know.

I really was excited for caving, too. It's one of those things I've always wanted to do.

I wonder, though, if I'm just too big even if I was in shape. I'm not a small guy! I mean, 6'4" is nothing to scoff at! Who knows. The only way to find out is to get in shape, and that's what I've been working on since the school year began (albeit sporadically - I really should stick to the fucking schedule, eh?).

On a happier note, I'm second in the reserve line for the trip to Mt. Washington this February. Only second! I should probably be bummed I'm in the reserves and not going on the trip, since unlike a lot of people in the club, I am a senior. However, senior or not, I'm still new to the club. Shit go down like shit go down. Besides, it's probably better if I don't go. 1) I'm broke. 2) I dunno if I could handle the trip in my shape. 3) It'd be happening right in the middle of when I should be working on my senior design project.

Three great excuses to not be sobbing myself to sleep. Good enough for me.

Life is grand, ain't it? (This is not a sarcastic remark, despite what the context may imply.)