Teegip: Bob Came in Pieces

Having just gone through the hell that is getting all of the gold medals in the game, I felt compelled to write about it.

Bob Came in Pieces is basically Lunar Lander with a physics engine and puzzle solving. You remember Lunar Lander?

Look at that beauty, mhmmm.

Now you do.

I love Lunar Lander. I don't know what it is about it, exactly, but I do. And as a result, any time there is a game that is even remotely similar in mechanics, I want to try it. So I bought Bob Came in Pieces when it was on sale (as I buy almost every game these days).

Here is the good: It is Lunar Lander with puzzle solving! You build your ship using pieces collected while passing through the levels. There are rockets, which propel you (duh), and you can assign each individual rocket to a key of your choice. The same goes for other tools. Then there are "modules" which allow you to make your ship bigger. Naturally, it is a bad idea to build a ship that's off-balance!

This will only end in success.

It's a neat idea and one that I'm glad has seen its way to a finished project! Hurray for independent developers! (Though to be fair, similar things have been done before... just not, to my knowledge, in a Lunar Lander type of game.)

Using your clever mind, you build ships to reach into tiny cracks, or crash into an object with a much force, or... other things.

Look, ma, I'm solvin' puzzles!

Here is the bad: Holy goddamn shit is this game frustrating. Collision detection is way overkill (getting stuck on an object that you're barely even touching). But I could get over that as it was rarely a big problem...

Okay, I understand that this is physics and shit and it's up to you, the player, to build the ship properly, etc. HOWEVER! There is this thing you have to do sometimes. After you reach a certain level you get this "pull beam" and it lets you "pull" things. Sounds like an excellent avenue for physics-based puzzles, right? WRONG! The second you actually start pulling - or pushing later on, though that's significantly less irritating - your ship's balance goes completely out of whack and often the object you're trying to pull goes flying off in a direction you never imagined possible and then you want to chase after it but somehow you're upside down and and and AHHHHH.

what the hell, this fucking box wouldn't go in ughhhh

I suppose there's a possibility I just suck at building these ships, but I refuse to admit to something so preposterous.

Anyway, because I am stupid and I hate myself, I decided to go for all the gold medals. Trying to fling those damn boxes in just the right place quickly almost literally made me visibly shake with rage. You should have seen it. A sight worth seeing. (I'm lying.)

Final verdict...

Here is the best: If you couldn't tell from the title, the game is overflowing with puns. :3

Innit punny?

Here is the worst: There's a free update coming soon and I know I'll be compelled to at least give it a try. It's a slippery slope from there. ):

Teegip: Mirror's Edge

Just realized I've had this sitting around for a while now and never clicked "Publish Post." So here goes! Edited to be a little more accurate for my current circumstances.

No one will every figure out what Teegip means. And that is okay.

On Black Friday (and then again around Christmas) there was a sale on that video game digital distribution hub we all know and love, Steam. I nabbed a ton of games for anywhere from $2 to $9.99 - though I probably shouldn't have, even at those prices. I am a little tight on the money.

At any rate, one of the games I purchased was Mirror's Edge, for the low low price of $5.00. A mere tenth of its PC release price. A deal? Fuckin' right. It is not a long game, but it was one of the most exhilarating experiences I have had in the gaming world in a long time. (Where long means since before I went to Japan.)

WARNING: SPOILERS, KIDS. Step away from this blog post if you have yet to play this game that came out last eon.

Behold: the title screen.

This is where it all begins.

I suppose, in the interest of fairness, that I should point out that I had been waiting for this game to go on sale for a while. Not because I did not think it was worth full price, but because Steam sales have spoiled me. As such, there can be no doubt I am slightly biased and trying to justify my purchase, or finding beauty where there is none.

lol j/k it was five bucks, dudes

The game begins, as most games these days, with a tutorial. An unfortunate necessity, I suppose.

But then you play the game.

Some cutscene somewhere.

The colors! One might argue that environments of Mirror's Edge, with their heavy use of primary colors and White, look quite sterile. One might be stupid. Goddamn refreshing.

And here I am sliding down a zipline, about to land on the next roof!

This game makes me feel awesome.

A truly frightening leap.

Death-defying stunts lie around every corner. I would be scared shitless if I had to do this in real life. Not least because it is completely and totally insane.

FLYING DRAGON KICK.* Enemy hidden behind lower body. *Not the actual name.

I even love the combat. A lot of people do not. They are dumb. It is fun, as long as you do not charge in headfirst.

But I charged in as such anyway. Because I am awesome.

Exploring a building's innards.

Even the indoor areas offer excitement. This is another common complain apparently. The populace does not approve of the indoors. What is wrong with the populace? I submit that they are dumb. Oh, have I already said that? Good.

About to take on some snipers.

The shifts in color are sudden, but effective. Also this part was badass. Weaving in and out of cover to avoid the numerous snipers and make one last desperate leap before breaking through the final door to safety... Good times.

Nearing the end.

It is nearly time to win the game. Once on the roof, I will watch some boring cutscene, then leap off the roof to catch the railing above the helicopter door and kick the bad guy in the face and laugh as he flies backward screaming in the agony of imminent death.

Unfortunately everything past the leap is scripted, but it was still awesome!

BOOM hangonkatehangon

I won! Kate, don't fall! Oh wait, I don't really care; I just like this screenshot.

The end.

What's that? What about the flaws? Of course Mirror's Edge had flaws, but no one cares. Go away, child.

Mirror's Edge gets a banana.